Mad Max, a mean sun and you.

Nails and fails and an aghast red monster.

I AM TOTALLY IN:

madmax2015

holy mad max

Mad Max: Fury Road. With Tom Hardy. More Images.

MEOW: Your puss dares you to support this Kickstarter. It double dog dares you. This, on the other paw…

YOU FILTHY ANIMALS: Frankly, we can get kind of nasty. That’s just how it is. We are covered in germs. So this right here is not only bitchin’, it’s hygienic.

WHISKEY A NO-NO: I do not like the taste of this. Nope. Not one bit. Well, I’m mean, the idea of the taste to put a point on it. It just seems weak.

ELMO SCARED:

elmo.shocked.(source)

OFF TARGET: The fallout from Target’s customer security breach continues. If you are a customer of  Experian this is relevant to your interests.

THE SKIN YOU’RE IN: Let’s just make this clear. If you don’t want to look like a raisin by the time you’re just paying off those college loans, then you need to lotion up. And not just the moisturizer. It’s all about sunscreen boys. Seriously. Those of you on the younger side are lucky. When we were kids our parents doused us in baby oil and sent us on our way. But for reals. Moisturize already.

THEN THERE’S THIS: There are different rules for birds.

AND ALL THIS TIME HE’S BEEN GETTING YOU DOWN:

People sure can work themselves into a fit over cover songs. They seem to inspire debate similar to the recent love cilantro/hate cilantro dust up. But when they connect, they can be pretty amazing. This one is doing that for me right about now.

HAVING LIVED THROUGH IT…it makes me so, so uncomfortable all over again.

NAILED IT: Why people bite their fingernails. IT’S NOT YOUR FAULT. 

BIG BROTHER: Making bank off your privacy. Or, also, if you’ve got nothing to hide you’ve got nothing to fear. Take your pick.

LIKE NOBODY’S LOOKING:

 

peanuts.dancing(source)

WORST REPUTATION EVER: Nobody trusts these guys. 

FOOD POISONING: No one wants to get sick from their food. It’s never not messy. But do you know what foods are most likely to make you temporarily relocate to the head? 

BECAUSE…throughout all the clawed furniture, the dead-of-night pukings, the torn up everything, you get this. That shit is unconditional.

NOT ENOUGH FRY SAUCE IN THE WORLD: For this. It would be so damn hypocritical.

INCOMING!

Need something else to read?

Tim Johnstone is Dappered’s music correspondent as well as our resident gatherer of all things interwebs related.

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