SAFE – Starring Jason Statham and a ton of bullets
There is a hairy chimp caged in the back of the mind. The bananas hang out of reach. If you can make him stop leaping and chittering and clacking his angry teeth, make him settle down and look around the cage, usually he can find some boxes which he can pile on top of each other, and some sticks, and some string to tie the sticks together. Then he can climb onto the top box and knock down some bananas.
– Travis McGee “One Fearful Yellow Eye”
Like having a drink by yourself, this only becomes an issue when it becomes what you actually prefer to do.
Nothing wrong with seeing a movie by yourself. It’s a great way to reboot the computer between your ears. We’re so busy, so connected, that a movie theater is one of the few places to go where you are forced to turn off the noise and zone out for a bit. Millions are spent on movies to separate the viewer from their reality. And sometimes, all you need is to step away from your reality for a little while. Once you come back, all the fog is gone.
Here’s what you want:
- A short movie
- Nothing too heavy
- An early afternoon showing
- A personal day you have left to burn, or, a company with a lax sick-day policy (take one only if you’re normally healthy as a horse, and the rest of the damn office bugs for home if they sneeze twice in a row.)
Now about Safe. It’s just over 90 minutes once you get through the previews. A stunningly large amount of them will be for Bruce Willis movies (try three in a row). The body count is outrageous. Statham is Statham. It’s nowhere near as good as The Bank Job. It has moments. There’s a few strikes & spares. There’s also a few gutters.
If you can’t allow yourself to like movies you know you’re not supposed to like, then skip it. For the rest, it’s worth the price of a matinee, and the mental Ctrl + Alt + Delete is a nice bonus.
I personally prefer going to the movies solo, it’s the best bang for your buck. Early shows let me watch the movie without dealing with typical audience issues. No real planning is involved, so I don’t have to worry about friends’ schedule conflicts and the usual. Keeping things hassle free is a win in my book.
when i grow up I want to be Jason Statham.
This movie sounds like a rewrite of Mercury Rising.
the funny thing is I did exactly this on Friday. A 9am showing for 5 bucks and was out by 11.
I am a big fan of going to the matinee and while I’m waiting for Netflix to check out Safe (personally, I think Statham movies have hit a rut), I do have a couple of recommendations:
The Raid: Redemption – An Indonesian action film that brings fond memories of the golden age of Hong Kong films in the 80’s and early 90’s. The movie starts off slow and deliberately, like a reverse Assault on Precinct 13, and then all Hell breaks loose and if someone isn’t get shot or punched then they are getting shot AND punched. It is awesome.
Cabin in the Woods – It’s a horror movie but, more importantly, it is a meta-satire of horror movies. Very smart and often very funny. The horror, itself, is a little flat but if you like movies that have more laughs and brains than scares (think Evil Dead) then you should give this a try.
While we are on the topic of movies…what are yalls thoughts on movie dates?
Jason statham is also dates Rosie the Victorias model.
Love this guy.
I found myself with a couple of hours to spare Friday (between a wedding rehearsal and dinner) and stopped into Cabin in the Woods. I’m not a big horror guy, but like was said above, it’s meta, so I enjoyed it.
Like most movies of its genre, definitely better to see it in a crowd. You can laugh out loud at the ridiculousness and not feel ridiculous.
Well, my wife loves ’em and has always loved ’em, so I’ve grow to accept them over the 14 years since we first met. I think she really appreciates the opportunity to mentally check out and do nothing but enjoy. Along those lines, we rarely see anything “complicated,” and stick to horror, rom-coms, and the occasional big dumb blow-em-up.
That being said, I much prefer something interactive, or where you can at least have a conversation.
Long story short, I think it really just boils down to personality and what’s going on in your life. I generally constantly feel the need to be challenged, learn something new or compete. My wife feels she gets enough of that in her day job (and the college and med school that led up to it), and she prefers to do nothing when she’s off the clock.
Statham movies really have hit a rut. From the few interviews I’ve read, he seems to dig the consistency and not think of himself as much of an actor, but I wish his agent and/or the studios would put him in something that leans more towards The Bank Job. 30 million budget on this one. Maybe double that and you get what you pay for at some point?
Heard REALLY good things about The Raid. Going to have to check that out.
I use to abhor the concept of going to a movie by myself until the local small theatre here had a one day only showing of Control (the Joy Division/Ian Curtis biopic) and I could not find anyone to go with. Now I’ve really come to appreciate going by myself. Its not like you really need someone to watch a movie with and I realize I love not having to share the armrests! And no more worries about missing a movie in the theatre because I waited to go with friends.
I’ve always thought that movies are kind of a lousy first date. A lot of awkward sitting in the dark next to someone when you should be conversing. Tack it onto dinner and it can turn a bad date into a long bad date. Once you’re actually dating its great, just not for when you’re still feeling each other out. Plus, opinions of films can be pretty polarizing.
I like to drag myself to the local indie theatre and watch classic re-runs. Being in the big city (Chicago) helps with having plenty of option.
I have to agree about The Raid: Redemption, a slow starter but once the guns are put down and the fists start flying the amazing choreography really shines. Highly recommended.
Every once in a while I’ll go to the Alamo Drafthouse solo for a movie and a beer. Great theater, good beer selection, no kids or jerks on their phones. If I can’t see it at the Drafthouse I’ll wait for the DVD.
As a law student, I have no class on Friday (which is not to say I have Friday “off”… I get to spend most of the day studying). Last fall I got into the habit of treating myself to an early bird movie every week. Honestly, I far prefer seeing movies by myself for $6 in the morning than coordinating times with people when the tickets are expensive and parking and seats are hard to find.
God I miss that place. I hear they may be opening one up in NYC… doubt it’ll be the same (likely too popular, overrun with people all the time, etc.), but one can hope.
I think it’s not a great date if you’re early in a relationship. I typically save going to the movies (which I rarely do these days anyway) for going with friends. It can be done, but it’s harder to pull off now that you’re old enough to drive yourself and don’t need mom to drop you off. Opt for drinks, dinner or something where you can be more active and/or conversational, so that you have a chance to develop a connection with your date.
Perfect timing. I just bought myself a solo ticket for a matinee showing of The Avengers on Friday at an AMC Dine-In theatre (if you haven’t heard of them, Google it. Amazing). Playing hookie from work. Good movie. Few beers. Win/Win/Win.
Are you talking about Music Box or Century Cinema on N. Clark?
Fellow Chicagoan, that’s why.
I find these “blow em up” movies more enjoyable, that the “realistic”, sad attempt at high brow indie movies that seem to be popular at film fests.
right, because it is impossible to enjoy both
That’s how I feel about it also. It’s a non-date date. You take someone out to a movie and you are basically telling them “I feel like I need to take you out, but I have no interest in getting to know you.” I personally try to only go to movies with friends.
right, because sensitive people like you get offended. I never said it was impossible to enjoy both, now did I? Read my post again and then you’ll be enlightened.
Move on. Thanks.
At times, I need to watch or rewatch a film by myself to really understand the themes of a movie but then again…I’m a film aficionado