Ask A Woman: Do women like a scarf type of guy?
If you’ve got a question that needs the female treatment, chances are you’re not the only one who wants to ask it. Beth is our source for the answers. From opinions on men’s style to decoding the sometimes mysterious ways of women, she’ll take on a different question every Thursday. And don’t worry, your identity will be protected too. Click here to get to know Beth, then get in touch with her by sending your question to: askawoman@dappered.com
Beth,
Recently, a girl wrote an article in my college’s newspaper promoting the scarf accessory on men. She said, “What would your European counterpart do? Well he’d keep that attractive short-sleeved T-shirt on and accessorize with a scarf.” I can’t say I’m on the scarf bandwagon (and the fact that she wanted us to dress more European), but do women like it or does it come across as “metro?”
– Sean
Hi Sean,
I love a scarf on a man. Whether it’s a soft cashmere or a toasty, bulky knit, I think it looks elegant and modern. Some other examples I love are this pinstriped scarf, this reversible style, this crinkly texture, and this beautiful plum color.
But I have to say I disagree with the coed you quoted. I like appropriate clothing for the appropriate season. I live in a place with all four seasons, so when I see a woman sloshing through the slush in open-toed high heels in January, I say to myself, why, Beth, why? Put the peep-toes in the closet until the thaw, darlings. So I say, reserve the scarf for late fall, winter, and early spring. You know, like when your neck might actually get cold.
As for the question of whether or not it’s metro…look, I hate to break it to all you male sartorialists out there, but “metro” is most frequently tossed around by men whose yearly clothing expenditures are equal to what they spend on coffee creamer, and by women who believe there’s only two kinds of footwear: athletic and flip-flop. (Not that there’s anything wrong with that, but come on, those of us hanging out in this corner of the Internet have different…priorities). Are you metro compared to Mr. Coffee Creamer? Yes, you are. Should you care? No, you shouldn’t. If you like a scarf, by all means, wear a scarf. If it’s not your thing, leave it by the wayside.
Since we’re talking about this more rhetorical question of men and fashion–what styles count as metro? Is being considered metro bad?–can I make a plug for the documentary Bill Cunningham New York? It came out on DVD
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For those of us who possess both a sartorial eye and a social conscience, it’s a bit of validation. Style, like movies and books and music, can be an escape from everything painful and bleak in this world. There’s also a current of tension throughout the film about a man’s place in the world of fashion, which is sort of addressed, but also sort of ignored. Good fodder for the theoretical discussions about “metro” style or interests we sometimes veer into here on Ask A Woman.
-Beth
Got a question for Beth? Send them to: askawoman@dappered.com
Yes, but, can I wear a blazer with shorts?
WELL said on the topic of “metro”. I’ve been called that by a ton of people and you know what? IMO, that just means they think I dress well.
A scarf is great in the winter. A scarf is not great with a T-shirt. Ever. Just like man-pris. Another ‘style’ that Europeans can keep to themselves.
I think the term “metro” stems from the Latin for “jealous.” 🙂
Enough with androgynous Euro-style.
Good take on metro. Really, it doesn’t mean much any more, I think. And a scarf with a t shirt, yeah, out of place.
you can wear whatever you want when ever you want (barring workplace rules)… your attitude pulls it off.
What I think is that the less you think about what they think, the more you get comfortable and confident with what you wear. The more comfortable and confident you look which helps you to pull it off, like G. Freeman said.
Wearing a scarf in cold weather = totally ok. Wearing a scarf in warm weather, with a t-shirt = less ok, unless you’re some kind of hipster.
I am no longer in college so you already lost me at wearing a t-shirt in public. A scarf just makes it worse.
With a t-shirt? way too trendy right now. (And by trendy I mean douche-bag.)
In my opinion, men’s style also has to serve some function. Once you’re past that point it seems kind of pointless.
I think this is one of the very few times I’ve read something devoted to men’s style that isn’t scared of addressing this issue – and you come out on the brave, correct side of it. Bravo, I say; there is such a thing as elegance in men, as fun for fun’s sake, of being the only guy with a semblance of style in a crowd of sky blue oxfords and black slacks. Wear what you will, and whether some guys will think you’re too “metro” (hate that term), there are just as many that silently applaud. Dressing well has been portrayed as being less of a man since men became scared about how they present and express themselves. It’s time for that to go. That Bill Cunningham documentary is just fantastic as well – and one of the best and most poignant of his lines, “He who seeks beauty… will find it” – resonates in my mind almost daily.
.. which then makes it WAY less okay.
“Man Scarf” is a ridiculous term. Scarves are scarves.
I wore a scarf this morning to work with my corduroy blazer & no topcoat. Faux pas or fox paws?
That documentary is excellent. I was “dragged” to a screening of it with my girlfriend and ended up finding it extremely well done. I highly recommend it.
Just playing devil’s advocate – so what’s functional about wearing a tie, pocket square, cufflinks with french cuffs (vs. a buttoned barrel cuff)?
What if we buy a lot of coffee creamer? I likes my Peppermint Mocha for this time of year, and my Hazelnut Latte for all times of the year.
If it was cold outside, you’re good.
Very well written. I loved your shoe choices of the not-so-chic woman.
This article makes me think that Beth isn’t a true fashion expert like this woman.
http://www.ehow.com/video_7379709_scarf_tying-techniques-men.html
I wore a scarf over a plain t shirt and under a cardigan today, and it looked fine (I was plenty warm in 45 degrees).