Individualism (or lack thereof) on Dappered
Above Black Sheep Photo Credit
I’ve been enjoying your site for a few months now. I find that you have several helpful tips and classic approaches to style. My one complaint is that it seems that the styles that are often depicted lack any individualism. If you are dressing like the ad you received in the paper I guess that’s fine. But I’ve always wanted to stand out a little or formerly a lot.
What I do now that I have a job and want to move forward in it is use accessories and colors for an expression of individualism. I wear a ring that my grandfather made, or green shoes (I’m thinking of your green pants, I’d wear them!) If a person is going to pull an oddity off than the rest of your outfit must contain style and said accessory must be worn confidently. What are your thoughts?
– Matthew
.
What are my thoughts? I have two:
1. To many, I’m probably considered stylistically subtle or downright boring. But that’s me, and I’m good with that.
2. This website isn’t about me. And I can’t tell anyone how to be an individual.
If you’re trying to be an individual, then you’re not. (I know, heavy.) If you’re often looking for someone to show you how to be an individual, then you run the risk of coming off as contrived.
If you have a ring that your grandfather made and you love it? Of course you should wear it whether rings are “in” or not. You’ve got to do what feels/looks best to you and to hell with the detractors. That’s why there are few if any “rules” mentioned on this website, and the suggestions are nothing more than that. Just suggestions.
It’s better to show your individuality in how you act than in how you dress, and sometimes too much emphasis is placed on the latter. At the same time those pieces of individuality (like the Grandfather’s ring) are terrific, yet pretty difficult to suggest to a group. Besides, no one can effectively tell you how to add those true individual touches to your personal style. That should be all up to you.
Because if that weren’t the case? There’d be even more guys walking around with barbed wire bicep tattoos.
So we’ll err on the side of caution. Just can’t risk having that blood on the hands.
On this topic of individuality and consumerism, allow me to refer you to one of the most fascinating documentaries ever: Century of the Self, by Adam Curtis. It’s not some obvious rant; it’s a mind-blowing conceptual history of the 20th century.
The full four hours can be viewed here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IyPzGUsYyKM
I use Joe’s tips as framework where I fill in with my own taste. This site gives me a vision of how a pair of shoes work with certain pants or how a shirt or jacket will make an outfit pop. But never would I just buy every item in an outfit of Joe’s and claim it. I consider Joe my ambassador to the shopping world. If you put me in the middle of the mall and said “go ahead” I’d probably find the closest bench and veg out on my iPhone. I just don’t do brick and mortar stores. Not for me.
This is too deep a topic to be taliking about first thing Wed. morning. To be quite honest, as Joe stated, the lack thereof of individualism is not something you seek out to acquire. individualism comes from with in. Per example: We well dressed gents understand (or should) the history of the pieces we wear, our history and the garments history, and you put the two together and you get your individualism. As boring as Joe says he is, he is actually expressing his individualism. The pieces he shows on the site arent meant to all be liked, this is no Utopia. I cant truly say i have like everything Joe puts out, but as i read the comments, i see the people that do like them and they express why they like them, thus showing their own individualism. In the same breathe it makes me more open to other tastes…
In closing (long i know, blame Joe for being too deep), unless you are purchasing everything Joe is showcasing, your individualism is something only you can control. We know we are different becasue we represent a small population of American (mostly) men that want to look good…
Really, I think dressing well but also expressing one’s individuality comes down to a pretty simple idea:
Learn what looks good, understand what you’re working with, and then do what you want.
If you’re asking other people to help you become more of an individual, then you’re doing it wrong. Dappered should be used as a guideline, not as a one-stop fashion mecca. If you’re looking for items with a little more pizzaz (a la green pants), then read The Choosy Beggar and A Headlong Dive as well.
Dressing in a classic, conservative style doesn’t make you boring any more than wearing a pink boa and a sequined onesie makes you interesting. It’s true that your clothes say something about you, but that doesn’t mean they speak for you.
Your individualism should shine through your actions, not your shoes. In fact, I find that those who dress the most “loudly” or “individually” are often the ones who have no better statement to make than the color of their shirt.
You clothing should reflect who you are, but it is not who you are.
There are plenty of great style blogs that showcase some more eccentric dressers. Dappered has a very specific young professional slant.
Dappered is a lot more about specific items than other blogs I read. I don’t think this necessarily detracts from the “individuality.” The focus is not so much on What I’m Wearing Right Now and more on This Is What’s On Sale This Week And Looks Cool. Some of Joe’s advice has lead even a diehard thrifter like me buy *gasp* something new!
I agree with JRok. I agree also with you Matthew that ” If a person is going to pull an
oddity off than the rest of
your outfit must contain style”. This site helps me (shop for and) build my a foundation of that fundamental style. I can add my own touches and accessories onto this foundation and know that they are supported by solid basic style. I think individual flourishes are best found on your own.
Without taking offense, I take exception to the inquirer’s complaint. I disdain extravagance for the sole fact of “individualism”. I look to my style as the containment of negatives – that is, my style and the pieces I wear serve to suit me and mitigate the negatives we all see in the status quo – not act as a social glow-in-the-dark necklace. My “me” comes from personality, not pattern or patina. If a piece of my attire has uniqueness to it, it’s because I particularly like that style – not because I look in the mirror prior to exiting the house and force myself to ask the question, “what one thing is unique today?”.
My personality and character serve my success and lifestyle, my wardrobe serves to not draw people away from my personality and character.
Amen. I think too often, people look in the mirror and implicitly ask themselves, “what will get me attention.” Take your green pants for example. Are you wearing them because you like how they look and reflect who you are? Or are you wearing because you’re excited at the fact someone will say, “he’s really different” [read: indie/alt/hipster/artsy/etc.]. That’s not an easy question as they are often intertwined, and it goes to the heart of your own psychology. If some of your motivation is the attention, I think that’s OK. But if your primary motivation is doing it because it will get you that sort of attention, then I think that its an immature attitude. It reminds me of the vapid high school alt kids. They were all flash, no substance. They were just as sensitive to cliques, their reputation, who they hang out with, their appearance, etc. as anyone else. They were just conformists to another set of rules.
Amen. I think too often, people look in the mirror and implicitly ask themselves, “what will get me attention.” Take your green pants for example. Are you wearing them because you like how they look and reflect who you are? Or are you wearing because you’re excited at the fact someone will say, “he’s really different” [read: indie/alt/hipster/artsy/etc.]. That’s not an easy question as they are often intertwined, and it goes to the heart of your own psychology. If some of your motivation is the attention, I think that’s OK. But if your primary motivation is doing it because it will get you that sort of attention, then I think that its an immature attitude. It reminds me of the vapid high school alt kids. They were all flash, no substance. They were just as sensitive to cliques, their reputation, who they hang out with, their appearance, etc. as anyone else. They were just conformists to another set of rules.
–best TAG Heuer phones To
be both a speaker of words and a doer of deeds.