Because accepting college or high school as your peak is pathetic.
“Enjoy it… your College years are the best of your life”
“Ah High School… the best time of your life”
It’s graduation season, and graduates (both high school & college) are probably hearing those nostalgic proclamations quite a bit. Whether they’re moving on to college, or moving away from “higher” education altogether, someone (probably 30 – 55 years old) is sure to profess that the student or soon to be ex-student is experiencing the pinnacle of their life.
It better not be.
That’s not to say that your late teens or early twenties spent at a University can’t be a blast. Far from it. But High School & College… it ain’t real. You’re still leashed. Fenced in. There are bumpers in your gutters and training wheels bolted to your back axle.
You don’t have anywhere the level of control you get afterward. You’re simply not able to make all the decisions you’d like to. Whether it’s the required gen-ed courses you’re forced to take, what the heck the dining hall is serving that day, or what time that class is offered this semester. Even your last name… your family (siblings, parents rep in the community) can box you in. Self-starters and creators can feel suffocated in the structure of high school, college, and early adulthood.
Control = Decisions + Effort.
Control + Time = Whatever the hell you want.
People who tell High Schoolers / College students that “these are the best of years of your life” thrived when they didn’t have control. That’s not good.
If your life peaks in high school or college, you’ve either had terrible luck, or, you’ve blown it. And if you’ve blown it, it’s never too late to retake some of that control by making different decisions.
For the grads or soon to be grads, if someone looks you in the eye and utters the “this is/was the best time of your life” garbage, nod and smile. And know that even if it was awesome, it absolutely gets better.
No more fences.
Go. Do.
True that. University moved way too slow for my pace, to be honest, so does my current job.
“That’s what I love about these high school girls, man. I get older, they stay the same age.” – Wooderson from Dazed and Confused
so so true Joe. College was great but I can definitely say that what I am accomplishing now is at a more substantial. I think fondly of college years but I wouldn’t go back and be that broke ever again.
I agree with this. I’ve always believed highschool, college was a time for you to bust your ass and work hard… at least that’s how it is in Asian culture… So highschool and college sucked so freaking hard for me. Worst times of my life.
(I think) I like that jacket in the top picture. Thrifted?
Not disagreeing with you, but I’m pretty sure most people are simply trying to impart the notion of “enjoy it while it lasts” whenever they use this phrase. You may not have total control during your college years, but you also have a whole hell of a lot less to worry about, too. You get to meet tons of new people who you will have a lot in common with, drink beer and go to all sorts of parties (if you so choose), have lots of sex (again, if you choose), and your only real responsibility is to go to class and (maybe) handle a part-time job. It’s a pretty great time.
I doubt you’ll find many people who will say college brought them more joy than marrying the love of their life or witnessing the birth of their children- but these are the same people who use the “best time of your life” phrase, because for most, the word “college” is associated with warm, happy, carefree feelings; it certainly is for me.
The achievements, rewards, and experiences are indeed superior after college, but so are the risks, responsibilities, and expectations. I often wish that I could go over to my buddy’s place and get drunk to let off steam on a Tuesday night with little to no repercussions, but I know that I’ve got to be on the beltway heading into work at 8am the next morning. I fully agree with you Joe: life after college is better, hands down. But I also recognize how incredible college was as well, and have used the topical phrase many times.
Wait’ll you have kids. That “control + time = whatever the hell you want” paradigm certainly shifts a bit. And yet, I’d have to say, undoubtedly, that I feel much more fulfilled, much more joyful, and much more comfortable in my clothes (so to speak) since the birth of my daughter, Ella.
College should be the best time of your life–while you’re there. Then move on. Each new stage presents new challenges, new joys.
As Steve Zissou says, “It’s an adventure.” All of it.
Absolutely. Well said. Not to mention telling someone they’ve already experienced the best life has to offer is pretty damn depressing. “Congrats, its all down hill from here”
Well stated. I had a great time in high school and college, met my wife shortly after I graduated college, and we spent time traveling and enjoying life before marrying and having kids. While I’m occasionally wistful for more free time, I feel as if my daughter (3.5) and son (7 weeks) have provided something that had been missing.
College was great, but I would never wish that I was back there. It’s all about enjoying the life you have now.
+1 to this. I can’t say I miss not having much money, working late into the night/early morning, and not being able to take time off in the late spring / early fall to get away on my own terms (more or less.) However, I met some of the best people, had more than a few fun times (at little expense) and grew more as a person than I ever had before. College is a great balance of new freedom with relatively few responsibilities. I just didn’t seem to care about all the “stuff” I care about now, and that was actually a good thing.
Right?
When I hear a phrase like that, I often have the impression it’s from someone who generally did what society/their upbringing told them was appropriate (graduate, marry, family, etc) and for whatever reason are starting to realize it’s not a great fit for them- hence the nostalgia for a time where there was less control, but perhaps a more open horizon, and definitely fewer responsibilities.
Spending a couple years like most people won’t, so that you might spend the rest of them like most people can’t: College.
It’s unfortunate that many consider college an ‘expensive playgound’. 70% of Americans are coming out with debt…which on average sits at about $ 30,000…I fear too many are going in thinking about how to make it the ‘best time’ and not using it as a tool for their future…
Not to mention the job market isn’t that great for college grads now.
I’ve been a daily reader of Dappered for years (I still remember the three posts per day). So, respectfully, you might want to qualify “it absolutely gets better” with “as long as you don’t have 6 figures of non-dischargeable student loan debt and can’t get any more work than a part-time retail job.”
Over 250,000 Americans with bachelor’s degrees or above make $7.25/hr or less (according to a BLS report from March). And that’s just the minimum wage. People making $8/hr or $10/hr aren’t included here, nor are graduates who don’t have any job at all. I’d love to see data for people making, say, $15/hr or less.
Suffice it to say, there is a wide gap between minimum wage and making enough to comfortably move out of your parents’ house (Gallup poll from February shows 28% of 24-34 year-old college grads living with parents) to do “whatever the hell you want.”
For a very large and increasing number of graduates, it emphatically DOES NOT get better.
as a recent College grad of 2 years I can tell you the struggle is very real
A lot of it is my location (Michigan) but College drastically felt like it offered more promise and opportunity
Absolutely.
Everyone’s college experience is difference. I’m not sure anyone is calling it their peak – I think some of us who are grinding right now would really love to get back some of the spontaneity, lack of real responsibility, and lack of real consequences. I can barely take a vacation from work now, let alone not show up because I don’t feel like it (like I would do with classes). I made some great lifelong friends and learned a shaq-load of life-lessons. Being surrounded with such a large quantity of girls/ women in such a small confined space, it was like being a bear in a fish hatchery.
For those suffering from the realities of a stalled job market – http://techcrunch.com/2014/05/20/1004549/
It’s apparently the new ‘monster.com’ for millenials…haven’t tried it but ‘every little bit helps’
God, I enjoyed every single day of college like it was my last. I knew the days where I had almost zero lack of responsibility for supporting myself were numbered and coming to an end, and I didn’t let myself forget it.
But…this is a tangent and I’m going to show my age here…I have to say 32 may have been the best year of my life. High school and college don’t have to be the peak of your existence. I honestly have to rack my brain when friends say, “Remember so-and-so…”. I’m sorry, I’ve moved on. That phase of my life is over. And I’m hopeful my best years are still ahead.
Amen. As a 31-year-old father of two (4 y.o. twins) with a third coming along shortly, I realize now that I couldn’t even imagine how happy fatherhood would make me back when I was in college. That’s not to say that college wasn’t great, especially because I was lucky enough to spend it with the love of my life, my life afterwards has been so much more fulfilling in every respect. Looking back, there are aspects of college I do miss, like the social opportunities, the camaraderie that comes along with good roommates and the almost absolute lack of accountability on Friday and Saturday nights, but overall, I wouldn’t trade what I have right now to go back, and it’s not even close.
In Office Space, there’s a great quote: So I was sitting in my cubicle today, and I
realized, ever since I started working, every single day of my life has been worse than the day before it. So that means that every single day that you see me, that’s on the worst day of my life.
My life seems to be the complete opposite: Every day, I make a point to do something that makes me a better person or makes the world around me a better place, whether it’s reading a book, learning a new skill, trying a new recipe, doing something new that scares me, volunteering, teaching or spending time with my children, coaching youth sports, reading Dappered (had to throw this one in for Joe!), etc. As a result, I generally feel like every day is a little bit better than the day before. So that means that every single day that you see me, that’s on the best day of my life.
Ah, but… control = decisions + effort.
You decided to have kids man. And more power to you. But that was a decision you made. And it sounds like it’s certainly paying off and then some.
I think if you actively choose to have a bit more to worry about WHILE in college, you can set yourself up to worry less farther on down the road. That’s not to say you can’t drink beer and go to parties, but don’t have that be the sole focus of your free time while in school (if, you go to college)
I do see what you’re saying, but the goal is to get to a place where you call your own shots. And that requires decisions. Decisions you can really make once you get out and on with it. That’s something I think that’s worth cherishing, and “enjoying while it lasts” (i.e. while you’re alive) much more than the stereotypical college experience.
If it doesn’t get better, then why take on 6 figures of non-discharageable student loan debt? Just because everyone else is doing it and it seems like it’d be fun at the time? The post never said you had to go to college. That’s a whole other post: http://dappered.com/2013/07/ten-unnecessary-lifestyle-killing-expenses/
“I fear too many are going in thinking about how to make it the ‘best time’ and not using it as a tool for their future…”
100% agree. It’s amazing how far even a little extra effort in pursuing your career during your beer/chasing girls or guys time can go. Doesn’t mean you can’t still have fun while pursuing a degree. But it can really pay off and then some.
You don’t have accept that college/high school years were your peak to understand that the concept of “growing up” is vastly overrated. Once you’re out of college, you get tossed into the rat race that is the work force. You spend 1/3rd of your week working jobs that aren’t the most fulfilling. We can’t all own businesses or have careers that enrich our lives. There’s a reason so many adults are so depressed/anxious.
Couldn’t agree more. Excellent points.
Two guys are camping in the woods. A bear crashes through the trees into their campsite and begins to roar at the two men. One of the men quickly laces up a pair of running shoes.
“What are you doing?? You can’t outrun a bear!” says the other man.
“I don’t have to outrun the bear. I just have to outrun you”
From a purely selfish perspective, I hope you keeping thinking like that. It allows those of us who are flat out dumb enough to think otherwise a better shot. Cuts the pool of competition down quite a bit.
I really enjoyed some things about college. Like the instant camaraderie you get from participating in a group or activity (in my case, music ensembles) where you’re all working to achieve a common goal. Other things, I won’t ever miss, like the age/race/income/background homogeneity, being treated like a kid at a 4-year-long summer camp by administration and staff, housing and meal plans that stymie the development of basic life skills, etc.
Law school, on the other hand… I wouldn’t touch law school again with a 100 foot pole, even if they paid me $100,000 (instead of the other way around). Hated every minute of it.
All in all, I’m so much happier to be out of school and a “real adult” with meaningful control over my life decisions (big and small). I’m also glad to be well shot of the culture of binge drinking and alcoholism that predominates the so-called “social scene” in both college and law school.
I get your point, but I think what most people are lamenting when they tell a 19 or 20 year old that college are the best years are the lack of freedom to do (within reason) almost anything you want with your free time. Once you go to grad school, incur debt and start a career, or have a kid, you lose the ability (or at least most do) to, say, pick up and decide to travel in Europe for two months with a backpack and a shoestring budget.
College shouldn’t be the highlight of a person’s life, but as someone who is well into a career and has a two-year-old at home, my advice to any College student is to not be afraid to get out there and live life as much as possible before being sucked into the “idea” of how your life is suppose to progress. EDIT: And that’s not to say I’m not happy now, which I am, I just–like many–miss the idea of being able to just take off for three weeks with no worries.
If I had it to do over again, I would have took a year or two off to travel after college. People that I know that did are realistically just as far into their careers and lives as I am at this point, but with some great memories to look back on. People get caught up in the rat race much earlier than they should, and that’s what people are generally complaining about I think when they say college are the best years.
It cant be as absolute as you lay it out. Plenty of people make good choices and exert maximum effort and still don’t have the best lot in life. Sometimes as an adult things just don’t work out. Mortgages/rent, children, employment status, Marriage/divorce… these are things younger versions of ourselves don’t have to worry about – things that adults have to constantly be cognizant of. Granted, being young and relatively worry free isn’t as good as it gets in life, but transitioning into adulthood certainly doesn’t universally make life better.
My point is, there is a couple of exit ramps between peeking in college and adulthood is all its cracked up to be.
The pros of my college years include: eating as much as I wanted & not gain a pound; drinking as much as I wanted and be fine the next day; any physical activity did not result in soreness; ridiculously easy to make meaningful friends; ridiculously easy to hook up with beautiful girls; wearing extremely comfortable clothing was socially acceptable and encouraged; sleeping in; 3 day weekends.
If the above are the criteria, then college was the best days of my life. Fortunately there’s so much more to life than that. I tend to live in the moment. I don’t dwell on the past and [might be a fault] I don’t look too far ahead into the future.
This is the choice I made.
Let’s just hope that when I “+time” it, that “doesn’t have a degree” glass ceiling breaks.
Looks like it’s leaning towards “doesn’t have a Master’s degree” glass ceiling. I wish I could say I hope you’re right and mean it.
With the exception of the law school, sounds eerily similar to my scenario and situation. Glad to hear I’m not a complete loner on this perspective.
I know. 🙁
It’s a vicious cycle, where the new “standard” is a college degree (instead of a HSD/GED), with the Master’s becoming the new new “standard”. Something’s gotta break, or everyone leaving college will be required to have a Master’s or JD to land a job.
I just can’t comprehend why companies want to pay so little for employees who have degrees. If it were financially viable, it would be worth the time+effort, but currently it’s not. :/
Instant camaraderie? We must not have had the same group project experience…
Well, that’s a different discussion altogether. By the time your post becomes applicable, the person has already gone to college — and possibly finished. Hence the “best years of your life” stuff. I’m not saying everyone should go, but these days, once it gets to the point where we’re having this conversation, it’s a chillingly common possibility that people’s expectations are going to be too high.
In some ways, it could be the best time of your life for no reason other than the optimism that permeates the collegiate environment. I see a lot of people rendered bitter or cynical upon exiting college because the world they see isn’t the one they were promised. That’s on them to fix, but still, it’s understandable how people would look back at what is essentially their late childhood and think fondly.
I agree, though — imo, it’s a flawed comparison from the start; there are different kinds of happiness. It may not be the happiest time of your life, but it’s the only time you’re likely to experience that quintessentially youthful form of happiness.
I was referring to extra-curricular groups and activities. Clubs, teams, music ensembles, etc. Like I said, in my case, I played with the top band and orchestra at my college, which were both high-level ensembles that toured nationally and internationally. That was a lot of fun and, despite not being a music major, I made the vast majority of my college friends through those ensembles and the music department.
I daresay I spent more time practicing and rehearsing with my instrument than I did attending class or studying for my actual major. And I ain’t mad about it.
It’s not just that the companies want to pay little, it’s also that they can. If everyone pays $X for a new (insert specific title), then that’s what the new guy gets. From there, hard work and networking can create opportunity.
Thank you for saying this. People pull the “wait’ll you have kids!” card as if there is no decision on procreation.
Having had a life in between high school (and a different high school experience at that, military boarding school) and college, I had a different view than a lot of my ‘peers’ , namely, get in and get out. I didn’t need the self discovery, the parties, or much in the way of friends, and new experiences. I understood that the loan onus meant I’d be paying for any screwups that increased my stay there.
All that said, it certainly was fun. Roaming around the woods, marking trees, cutting, drawing maps, staff compass traverses, my major of Forest Management was pretty awesome. But if I took the “best days of your lives” lie at it’s face, I’d never have ended up where I am now:
I live in Alaska. My job takes me around the state, by helicopter, by snowmachine, by jetboat, by landing craft, by floatplane, by atv, by foot, and occasionally by dogsled. This state continually humbles me with its incredible beauty, and immense size. Nothing in college could have measured up to the adventures I’m going through now, and I make it a point to keep improving my life; to learn to garden, build a shed, fix up a Jeep, raft the Kenai, dipnet the Kasilof, hike Kesugi Ridge, hunt the Denali Highway… up here, adventure is right out your front door.
Don’t settle. Get out and live life, you only get one.
“Our battered suitcases were piled on the sidewalk again; we had longer ways to go. But no matter, the road is life.” – Jack Kerouac
Below: On the Skwentna River, looking at Mount Yenlo in September.
http://www.lifebuzz.com/mike-rowe/#!O3k4z
College… or high school. Both suffer from “best-time-of-your-life”-itus.
The idea that young people can do anything in their free time and older people can’t is, IMO, an illusion, and a product of our inability to recognize that the costs we accrue in college are real and they aren’t going anywhere. If anything, it’s a young person’s erroneous belief that loan money grows on trees that directly results in their getting tied down to crushing debt after graduation. The only way most college-aged people could afford to spontaneously pack up and move to Europe for a couple months is by using their student loans or their parents’ money… or by spending their own money that would otherwise, in the absence of loan/family money, be going towards tuition.
I was able to travel to Spain and the Czech Republic/Germany for a couple weeks each during my college summers, but that was only after scrimping and saving AND having parents and grandparents who were able to help me out substantially. Otherwise, I was either studying, rehearsing, or working. I had crap summer jobs and part-time jobs throughout the school year. I did not find myself with a surplus of either free time or money. The upshot is, due to a combination of privileged circumstances and old-fashioned elbow grease, I was able to walk away from both college and law school with no debt. And now I make enough money that I can actually afford to take real vacations… though probably not two months’ worth at a time.
Long story short – the relative freedom from serious financial burdens that students “enjoy” during college is, for most people, an illusion. Indulging in the illusion only exacerbates the outcome.
I disagree that the options I discuss above are for the privileged and financially reckless only.
I know multiple people who graduated college, worked the best job they could find during the summer after graduation, and then traveled for a few months before coming back and hunkering down and either applying to grad school or searching for a career-track job. I also know a couple of people who managed to live a traveling lifestyle for a few years after college by traveling for six months, and then working their buts off for 6 months to afford another trip. Not all of the people I’m thinking of graduated with student loan debt, but I do know people that had debt and still managed to travel for a time before coming back and getting a job and going to grad school. None of them are worse for the wear.
Granted, my frame of reference is the early 2000s, and the market–while not great–was nowhere near as bad as it is now and allowed for a certain flexibility with regards to when a person decided to join the workforce. Though if the market stays this bad, we’re going to have to have a fundamentally different conversation about college and grad school being worth it anyway.
Point being, I am of the opinion that people rush towards what they consider the “real world” in this country. Gap years and summers (often working, so no debt is incurred) abroad are pretty common in European countries, and not just for families that would be classified as rich or “privileged” by American standards. It’s as much a choice of lifestyle and rush to join the “real” world as it is anything else that prevents people from exploring those type of experiences in the US.
Good, but do people really tell graduating students “that was the best time of your life”? Does anyone really think this?
I’m not sure I was trying to pull a card. Not at all. I was simply
saying this: an abundance or scarcity of time does not necessarily need
to define your relative happiness. I have less time for “whatever the
hell I want” now, yet I feel happier.
I didn’t take it as you were pulling a card… but you did choose to apply your time to producing and caring for offspring (“whatever the hell you want”… kids). You also put forth the effort and made the right decisions to get yourself in a place where you could be a happy, proud parent, and thus, obtained control there.
But again, you made the choice. One which not everyone makes. So providing “wait’ll you have kids” as evidence doesn’t necessarily apply.
While I hear you on the “wait’ll you have kids” card, I think people are also a little too quick to pull the “well that was your decision” card as well any time a kid is mentioned as part of the “time” equation. I have a kid, and I am very content and happy with that decision.
That doesn’t mean I can’t look back nostalgically to a time when I didn’t have the level of responsibility I have now. Nor is it any less annoying when my friends who have decided to remain childless pull the “decision” card when I tell them I can’t make it to a party because I have a parental responsibility that night. Point being, playing the card cuts both ways.
If your friends give you a hard time about having a family, then you might want to find some new friends. Sheesh, that’s crappy of them. Friendship = not making someone feel obligated. Cripes.
Point is: Nobody play any cards 🙂
I probably didn’t explain myself well, but my point is that the “cards” are played almost on a subconscious level.
I told myself as a new parent that I wouldn’t be the guy who talked about how great it is to be a parent. Then, a kid becomes a big part of who you are, and you find yourself talking about how great it is to be a parent and have a kid without even realizing your playing a “card.” I’m sure that’s annoying to people who don’t have kids.
Conversely, childless couples do the same thing. It defines who they are, and they start talking about how happy they are to not be parents and not have that responsibility without really realizing what they’re saying can come off as annoying or self-righteous to someone who is a parent.
I guess that’s why I find the whole “playing the card” thing as kind of meaningless. Outside of the rare a-hole, no one is really trying to judge or offend the other person. Both sides do it to such a degree that they’re often not even really aware its happening.
Ahh grad school, the best time of your life…said no one. ever.
Yeah, College (and high school) is not the best time of our lives unless we peak there (and some do).
That being said, its easy to think that sometimes. There are some aspects in life that probably will never be better than they were during college. The easy a making tons of friends, being able to hangout with friends constantly, being able to party all the time, etc. It’s easy to look back at college and remember just those few things and say “Ah I miss college. Those were the days.”
But the reality of it is there are a ton of things that are better after college. Such as not eating ramen noodles every day. That’s why I like to go back to my university every now and then. I get to soak in a little nostalgia and enjoy the easy life for a weekend. And then when I get home I remember and appreciate all the things that ate better now. (Hey look, my apartment doesn’t have black mold!)
Wish it would’ve went even quicker so I could’ve started my company sooner and devoted my full attention to it.
With a thousand new grads applying for (insert specific title), a company can pay virtually whatever they want. Someone will take the offer at a smaller salary.
This is quite an opinion piece, as confirmed by the comments. It is very circumstantial, and that is the only truth that can come of this.
I know a few individuals who zipped through college and studied their asses off and worked extra hard to complete a double major in under 3 years and then end up working at a major consulting firm at age 22… and then when I joined them 2 years later, they were like “yeah dude, college went by too fast. I didn’t have enough fun.” I also know people who had too much fun and pissed their life away, and now sleep on couches and work odd jobs to get by. Circumstantial.
Why do it? Because children in this country are brainwashed from the moment they understand English by every authority figure in their lives to believe that college is the only way to a middle-class lifestyle and that trades, which in reality can be far more lucrative, are for losers.
You can’t tell people throughout their formative years that mangoes are purple and then at age 18 ask them what color mangoes are and when they say “purple” tell them “Haha, wrong, idiot! Now your life will suck forever and it’s your own fault because you CHOSE the wrong color.”
Only within the past 5 years or so could you even dare to suggest that college may not be the best move for everyone and not be pilloried as an batshit wingnut. And that idea is still a LONG way from the mainstream; most people will still look at you like you’re crazy. Not everyone is as smart as a Dappered reader.
But, yes, I suppose this is a whole different conversation now.
“”Point being, I am of the opinion that people rush towards what they consider the “real world” in this country”
Not only is the above statement true but, in America at least, children, from an early age, are pushed if not forced to decide “what they want to be” when they grow up. Too many people make their degree and career decisions based upon a very romanticized veiw of what their world will be like.
Why take on the debt? Because damn near every person in the last 20 or so years has heard nothing more than (or some variation of) “you’ve got to have a degree to make it” while at the same time damn near every employer above fast food has it in their heads that any person without a degree is utterly worthless.
Huh… do comments on here actually get deleted? I don’t see my post.
It seems to me the comment “wait till you have kids” is just a short way of saying “Assuming you plan to have children, once you have children you have an additional set of constraints.” It is a way of pointing out that once you have children it becomes harder to do certain things than before you have children. Similarly, while you’re in college it is much easier to do certain things than once you graduate, which is why people encourage new college students to enjoy it while they’re in it. By the way, I don’t know anyone who tells a recent grad “you’ve just ended the best phase of your life.” If someone really believed that, you would not want to take their advice!
Right! But does anyone really say that? I think it was just a straw man to make a bigger point.
Unless you are an athlete with dashed hopes of going pro, cause you got your girlfriend pregnant (Al Bundy), those days shouldn’t be the best days of your life.
Did you rent your own apartment come sophomore year?
I find this amusing. So there’s people who loathed high school. Not new. They hate the football players and the cheerleaders. Now they apply that same disdain towards college. There seems to be misguided bitterness.
Yea, I get it, you’re a “self starter” and a “creative” who will start a company, you create your “own rules” and you’re “your own boss.” Yea, yea, I get it. Typical. Typical attitude which I am way too familiar with.
You’re out of the Matrix and you look at the sorry suckers in college because they’re not in the “real world.” Yea, yea, I get it.
Seriously, Joe, what prompted this article? This reeks of self-importance and arrogance. I’ve heard of the saying which is the subject of the article (I disagree with the saying as do you) but never in my life (maybe it has happened to me but it escapes my memory) have I heard someone actually say that.
I for one enjoyed high school. I also enjoyed college despite some turmoil. And after college I “Do.”
>>Don’t settle. Get out and live life, you only get one.
Well, you did quote Kerouac who, after all, who mooched off his aunt for money.
Why not just go to a cheaper public university and major in a professional field? I don’t know a single engineering student or graduate from my undergraduate alma mater that is facing or faced the prospect of six-figure debt and unemployment.