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Lost Salinger, Lake Monsters, & Pinup Girls! … Sorta.

December 6, 2013 By Tim Johnstone | Heads up: Buying via our links may result in us getting a commission. Also, we take your privacy rights seriously. Head here to learn more.

I GOUDA NOT HAVE SAID IT BETTER:

cheez

BUYER BEWARE: If corporations are people, this guy is an asshat. Luckily, someone is calling bullspit.

GEO-CASH: Finders keepers?

LITERARY MIND BLOWER OF THE DECADE: This right here is a huge, huge deal.

THE CHRISTMAS GIFMONK:

xmas.chipmunk

SINGLE SERVING TUMBLR OF THE DAY: Meow. You’re welcome. 

THE THINGS THAT DREAMS ARE MADE OF: When I was a boy, I dreamt of things like this. Amazeballs. Also, this.

DOUBLE DIPPING: It’s not just a party faux pas. I had no idea this was a thing.

KRAMPUS IS COMING:

krampus2

Want to know the so-called truth about Krampus? Sure you do.

HAIR PIECE OF THE WEEK: I wonder if this comes in a merkin?

WHEN GATED COMMUNITIES ARE NOT ENOUGH: The paranoia is strong in this one. Also, an update on where we are headed?

I NEED THIS YESTERDAY: Practical and smart and can’t be here fast enough.

ADVENTURES IN SCARFING: 

I’m a fan of the Jet Pack. I have my reasons.

HEY ALANIS…now this is ironic. Talk about a bad day at the office.

WELL THIS OUGHT TO BE INTERESTING: I wonder how long it takes the big oil companies to put the kibosh on this?

INFOGRAPHIC OF THE DAY: Any monsters in your neck of the woods?

HE KNOWS IF YOU’VE BEEN NAUGHTY:

santa

I DON’T EVEN BELIEVE IT: They made a card game for yours truly! #misanthropesunite!

IT’S THE REAL THING: I think that this, more than anything else, has finally convinced me to give up one more vice. On the upside, I might have some new industrial strength cleaner.

PIRATE BAIT: This.

INCOMING!

Need something else to read?

  • I’m guessing some of this works for the white stuff too? 
  • Always.
  • If Santa is planning on bling for the missus, he best start here.

Tim Johnstone is Dappered’s music correspondent as well as our resident gatherer of all things interwebs related.

Filed Under: Etc. Tagged With: dossier

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Comments

  1. Winston Heard says

    December 6, 2013 at 9:21 AM

    seriously… krampus is terrifying.
    the bad effects of coke are neutralized when added to delicious rum, right? right??? tell me i’m right…

  2. Fraser says

    December 6, 2013 at 9:52 AM

    Coke: less acidic than orange juice. http://www.snopes.com/cokelore/acid.asp

  3. Peter Tirrell says

    December 6, 2013 at 10:10 AM

    I’ll vouch that Cards Against Humanity is a blast to play!

  4. Bryan says

    December 6, 2013 at 10:11 AM

    I take issue with the Coke link as well. The links between calcium loss and carbonation appear to be unfounded (See http://www.eatingwell.com/nutrition_health/bone_health/can_drinking_seltzers_sodas_or_other_carbonated_drinks_harm_bones ), and the link between phosphoric acid and calcium loss is at least disputed (See http://www.oprah.com/health/The-Health-Inspector-Common-Medical-Questions_1/3 ). As other commentators have pointed out, many things we eat or drink (especially citrus juice and vinegar) are of a lower ph than Coke.

    As far as the cleaning uses, consider than many of them let Coke sit for a long period of time – something that doesn’t happen in our stomach, and others simply rely on carbonation to lift particles away from a surface (something that doesn’t appear to be a problem in humans). Finally, consider that our stomach is alive and coated with a thick, constantly replaced mucus layer that protects from many of these issues. Unless you have preexisting conditions, it doesn’t seem like Coke is that big of a deal (from this perspective).

    That said, I don’t drink it, as I don’t like the sugar intake.

  5. RJC says

    December 6, 2013 at 10:32 AM

    Does that Coke article apply to the diet stuff, too? I basically consider diet soda to be the nutritional equivalent to slightly questionable water

  6. RJC says

    December 6, 2013 at 10:37 AM

    All praise Bigger, Blacker Dicks

    (this totally makes sense if you’ve played the game, I swear)

  7. Bert_McGurt says

    December 6, 2013 at 10:59 AM

    I wonder these days if Alanis actually intended that the only irony about her song “Ironic” is that nothing in the song is ACTUALLY ironic. If that was on purpose it’s VERY meta.

  8. Winston Heard says

    December 6, 2013 at 11:00 AM

    you’re not fooling us, bryan. i checked out your profile and your email is “bryan.employee@cocacola.com.”

  9. Bryan says

    December 6, 2013 at 12:10 PM

    I’ll admit that my fondness for carbonated cocktails likely prejudices my response…

  10. Bert_McGurt says

    December 6, 2013 at 12:11 PM

    Not to mention its reported use as a domestic cleaner (effective or not) doesn’t do anything to “prove” it doesn’t belong in your body:

    Point 3 alleges its use in getting blood out of clothing. Also effective for that purpose? Cold water. Apparently that doesn’t belong in your body either?

    Points 2, 7, 8, 10, 18, and possibly more can also be accomplished using vinegar (which is becoming a common “green” cleaning alternative in general). Granted, I wouldn’t drink a can of vinegar but no one is claiming that it doesn’t belong in your body.

    Point 5 can also be accomplished with table salt. Again, not great for you in large amounts over time, but in this case it’s a NECESSITY for your body.

    Point 12 is misleading and not unique to Coke: http://www.snopes.com/cokelore/tooth.asp

    Like you said, I don’t drink it because of the sugar/corn syrup, and because it leaves my teeth all fuzzy. On the rare occasions I drink pop, I prefer root beer.

  11. Patrick Snyder says

    December 6, 2013 at 2:41 PM

    I’m not convinced on those thumb drives. Is it better to have a bunch of disposable thumb drives where the case is made of recycled paper (though the actual useful components are all still the same, so this is nothing new) or to just keep track of one or a couple? Certainly doesn’t sound to me like a legitimately environmental alternative, but it does certainly sound like a gimmick.

  12. TDubin says

    December 6, 2013 at 2:54 PM

    On the Moon power station – yeah, right, microwave beams/lasers from space. Wait till the aim gets off a bit. Goldeneye anyone? Plus – the people worried about cell phone radiation and power line emissions are not gonna go for that either.

  13. CosmicQuandaries says

    December 6, 2013 at 3:34 PM

    Don’t worry, they are taking all that into account.

  14. TDubin says

    December 6, 2013 at 3:41 PM

    Hmmm, Japanese scientists. The same guys that built backup generators in the basement for an oceanside nuclear power plant .

    Let’s see if they can decommission Fukuishima without contaminating half of the Pacific. Then we can talk about lasers and microwaves from space.

    Not superstitious, just skeptical.

  15. Rob says

    December 6, 2013 at 4:00 PM

    This really is a great game. In case you haven’t played it, be warned that “jerking off into a pool of childrens’ tears” is a card.

  16. Todd says

    December 8, 2013 at 6:20 PM

    The link about getting fined for posting a negative review reminds me of my most recent *attempt* to purchase Allen Edmonds on Ebay. Seller Hitch-n-Post sold me majorly flawed McAllisters that had been sewn improperly and then restiched, leaving a row of stitching holes exposed along the sole…and the pictures and description hid the flaw. I tried to return them but got no response until I elevated it to an Ebay case. After getting my money back, I posted a negative review once I saw that they relisted the item, still without disclosing the flaw and with deceiving photographs. They flagged my review and Ebay removed it because I violated some fine print that says you cannot post negative comments after the case is handled through Ebay.
    FYI if you are bidding or “won” a pair of Bourbon McAllisters, sorry.

  17. spongeblog says

    December 12, 2013 at 1:06 AM

    I don’t wear scarves. Did read the 3 leaked Salinger stories.

  18. CosmicQuandaries says

    December 16, 2013 at 2:20 PM

    Nothing wrong with being skeptical, as long as it’s within reason.

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