Ask A Woman: What She Wants to get through the fall…
If you’ve got a question that needs the female treatment, chances are you’re not the only one who wants to ask it. Beth is our source for the answers. From opinions on men’s style to decoding the sometimes mysterious ways of women, she’ll take on a different question every Thursday. She also might provide an answer without waiting to be asked. That happens from time to time too. Click here to get to know Beth, then get in touch with her by sending your question to: askawoman@dappered.com .
Hi Beth,
I was wondering if you could do a slight tangent off your usual column. See, guys are always looking for gift ideas for their significant other. Birthday, Anniversary, I F#&-ed up, ect… What about recommending a handful of things for the significant others who are also women? Things that would really brighten their day if their guy bought it for them.
– Greg
Hi Greg,
Done and done! We’ll try this out quarterly, so that we can hit each season and provide some suggestions for holidays, birthdays, and anniversaries all year round.
Option #1. The Light Scarf
In most parts of the U.S., summer to fall means packing away tank tops and sandals and pulling out cardigans and boots. In that vein, I’d recommend a light scarf (bonus–this is a way to buy her sort-of-an-article-of-clothing without having to deal with sizing) as a great gift. Not a big woolen number that she’ll need for subzero temperatures, but something light to keep the chill off her neck when the temps get down into the 60s and 50s. Because this is a simple gift, you want to go for luxury–beautiful patterns, great textures or incredible fabrics. For example…
Michael Kors Jet Set Monogram Infinity Scarf – $88.00
This option from Michael Kors is the infinity style, which has been a trend for so many seasons, it’s now a classic. Great neutral color, and a subtle pointelle-knit pattern to give it some texture.
J. Crew Refined Silk Cashmere Wrap – $75.00
These are super simple, but it’s a silk-cashmere mix, which means it’s light as a feather, warm, and decadent on the skin. Available in black as well as an eye catching “brilliant flame”.
Missoni Chenille Mini Zig Zag Scarf – $150
Finally, the Missoni. This is a big name in women’s fashion, and the zig-zag pattern is their calling card. This version comes in beautiful fall colors. Made in Italy as well.
Option #2. A Handbag.
If your lady is really into style, a handbag would be a good gift. A lot of women use their purses seasonally–more casual, lighter-colored bags for spring and summer, and more structured, darker-colored bags for fall and winter. Add to her collection by getting her something in the latter category. Perhaps one of these looks like something your better half would carry?
Dooney & Bourke Croco Small Lexington Tote- $238
Dooney & Burke is a great brand. I own one of their bags myself and it’s beautiful and timeless. They’re also quite expensive, though this is definitely a case where you get what you pay for. This bag comes in neutral colors so it’s likely to match whatever your gal is wearing, plus it features the great croc-texture that D & B is known for.
Melie Bianco Kiera Top Handle Cross Body Bag – $59.95
If the Dooney & Burke price point is much too steep (and I don’t blame you at all), check out Melie Bianco bags. They make exceptional purses–high quality, attractive, classic with a modern twist–for very reasonable prices, mainly because they don’t use real leather. BUT, unlike other “plastic” purses, these bags will hold up through many years of wear (again, speaking from experience–I own one myself). Love the unique color combo of the bag on the left, and the very structured look. Sold through DSW so it ships free with the code SHIPR as long as you’ve joined their email list.
Foley & Corinna Nimble Crossbody – $117.99 ($195)
Finally, Foley & Corinna is a newer name in handbags, but they’re doing some really interesting work with the shapes of their bags. I love the caramel colors of this bag–perfect for fall. It’s also a nice option if your gal isn’t one to carry around a larger bag.
Option #3. An Experience
It wouldn’t be an AAW gift-giving guide if I didn’t recommend an experience! Yes, for those who just can’t predict what their lady might like in the way of material items, give an experience. There are so many dreamy, nostalgic connotations associated with fall–make a gift out of it!
How about a weekend getaway to the countryside? (Or at least a place that resembles the countryside). Someplace you can drive to, with lots of beautiful vistas, and not many distractions. If you’re in ski country, many rustic but fine hotels have discounted rates before the snow starts to fly. If you live near wineries, take her there. You can spend the weekend tasting wines and sitting by the fire at a B&B. Or apple-picking? Berry-picking? Yes, a little corny, but so fun, and totally out of the ordinary. Strong relationships are made through shared experiences, especially shared, unusual experiences. Pair a day of fruit-picking with an evening of fine food and a night at a nice hotel. If you prefer more activity, find some great hiking or biking trails nearby and pack a picnic. If money is tight and you want to skip the overnight at a hotel, make any of these activities into a day trip!
-Beth
Got a question for Beth? Send it to: askawoman@dappered.com
Option #3. Horseback riding along a beach/lake. Super romantic granted there aren’t hundreds of children along the pathway. (Celebrated SO’s bday this past weekend)
I would definitely recommend apple-picking. My SO and I went last fall and absolutely loved it.
Would I be an idiot to buy my fiance a Balenciaga handbag for christmas?
I totally didn’t scroll through this article, skip over everything but the $59.95 price-tag and think “$60? …..we’ll see…”
This is awesome Beth, I struggle with this all of the time. A new one around November in time for Christmas would be great. I know my wife really likes me to buy her clothes too (but I am hit or miss) so some tips about how to do that and what to look for would be really appreciated.
“How about a weekend getaway to the countryside?”
This this this. It’s almost fall, most anyplace with trees will be, very shortly, brilliantly colored.
Option 3, always. People can buy themselves the stuff they want. They can’t buy your time or affection. Those are more valuable than money.
I think the only time you should buy a product for someone is when that product is a reflection of your relationship (or their personality), and the act of purchasing it shows that they were on your mind. Perfunctorily buying random crap to maintain a quid-pro-quo is wasteful consumerism. Or charity, at best.
I mean.. I wouldn’t say an idiot but… there’s probably better uses of $. Shoot for that price you could go on a pretty solid trip…
Yes. Save the money for your wedding/honeymoon.
That is one hell of a cynical view of gift giving.
If you’re dead set on buying her something tangible, see if she has a public Pinterest account (most ladies do these days). It’s a literal treasure trove of items, ideas, and wishes that she wants.
My SO wants to learn to play the banjo, thus, the next thing I’m giving her is a banjo and banjo lessons.
Perhaps it already falls under option 3, but if not, I would add an option 4: lessons/classes. My SO has most often expressed interest in learning something new, e.g., banjo, French, tennis. So, whenever I go to the well in search of gift inspiration, I usually come up with some type of lesson or class.
That it is. But I can’t be the only one who stressed over what to buy people for the holidays. Christmas can become a total ordeal, especially in a big family. Gifts should come out of love, not obligation.
Beth – good list as always. But I think what you were really missing here was a cotton blazer with plastic sleeves. The way to any girl’s heart.
The guy who wrote this is specifically asking about buying a present for a female significant other, not asking about buying presents for his entire family on christmas.
That second comment explains the cause of the cynicism. The first comment is meant to address the post itself. All I’m saying is that you shouldn’t buy gifts because you feel obligated to do it. I enjoy gift-giving way more now that I’ve decided not to adhere to some preordained schedule.
That being said, I think it’s kind of warped that a handbag is a reasonable solution when one has “F#&-ed up”. Maybe that’s just me.
I wont vote you down like others here, because I respect your opinion. I just disagree with it LoL
Great suggestions.
More AAW columns like this; less in the “Why Don’t Women Like My Style Choices/Personality/Haircut” category.
https://www.amherst.edu/media/view/104699/original/christmas.pdf
Read it. Live it. Gift cards ftw. Economists know their business.
If not afraid of heights, bung…just kidding. A hot air ballon ride could be fun and a really nice experience.
For sure. I’m all for gift cards when the occasion requires it. I’d rather someone give me $100 than buy $100 worth of stuff they think I need any day.
DXLi is right on. If you’re going to buy someone a gift, let it be something that they either couldn’t or wouldn’t get for themselves, but might enjoy having, either due to thoughtfulness or their own practicality.
I’m happy with a Timex on my wrist, but if a girl saw fit to get me a Tissot, or a Shinola, or something like that, I’d wear it happily. And I would think of that person when I look at it.
If you can’t think of something like that, then go for the experience every time.
But I can afford it. And she works in high fashion.
Well then.. go for it, sir. Do it if she will truly appreciate it and love it. You know better than we. We are just some random folk on the interwebs after all.
I second this. I never do clothes as I feel like it’s such a gamble. Mostly because I don’t even know how to go about sizes.
Try Duolingo for Spanish. It’s better than Rosetta, and it’s free! http://www.duolingo.com/