Everyone’s seen that commercial where the car releases a gentle “honk” every time its owner starts to take something too far. Y’know, the one where he lands a first kiss but goes back in for tongue, goes all in at a poker table when he shouldn’t, and almost spritzes his junk with cologne. It’s a great spot. Makes you wish there was a similar device to let us know when we were over-inflating our personal style tires. There are tons of scenarios in men’s style where it’s just too easy to go overboard. These are a few of them.
1. Pattern & Piece Mixing
Here’s a dirty secret: The more “difficult” a well-put together outfit becomes, the less universal appeal it has. Meaning, your loud corduroys, tweed blazer, patterned shirt, knit tie, pocket square, leather bracelet, fine watch, and expensive welted boots might all look amazing to those who spend hours on men’s fashion forums, but to the rest of the world it looks like you’re trying too hard. And it also looks like you’d be a great target for getting mugged.
2. Matching Loud Leathers
Yes you’re supposed to match your leathers (shoes, belt, watchstrap). But they don’t have to be dead on perfect every single time. Especially if it’s a real noticeable shade, like a chili red or light walnut. If your belt, watch strap, and walnut Strands all look like they were cut from the exact same piece of leather, then you risk evoking that matching tie & pocket square look. If they’re reasonably close, you’re good.
3. Hair Product
Just before you think you’ve got enough in there, consider stopping.
4. Watch Face Diameter
This is a tough one. A medium sized guy can wear a watch that’s 43mm or more, but just make sure it doesn’t shout. You don’t want to project a “I drive a big truck to overcompensate”-esque impression from your wrist. Unless you’re Ce-Lo and then… well that’s just so damn over the top it’s something completely different.
5. Pursuing a Perfect Fit
It fits great in the shoulders, the chest, you love the color, the fabric, and the price. But you turn around in the mirror and you can see a shadow of a rumple on the back if you stand a certain way. So you take a picture, and you study it and you think you should maybe return it and JUST WEAR THE DAMN BLAZER ALREADY IT LOOKS GREAT.
6. Waist Suppression
A waist is a terrible thing to waste. But you have to be able to move in the thing. That said, some guys have broad enough shoulders and little beef in the middle, so they walk a fine line between looking cut and looking too sculpted. Meanwhile, if you think you’ve gone too far, well just remember #5. Most aren’t going to notice.
7. Pant Break
You don’t want your ankles to be drowning in fabric, but you don’t want high waters either. Keep some kink in there.
8. Living like a “real man”.
Live like yourself. That’s the most “manly” thing you can do. Of course there’s tremendous resources for learning new things and bettering yourself (AoM = one of the best websites out there regardless of genre). But to puff your chest out and proclaim you’re going to chase some hyper-idealized version of masculinity, instead of just trying to be a really good version of you, then that can be counterproductive. And maybe even a little sad.
Agreements, disagreements, etc… are more than welcome in the comments. Remember, there are always exceptions. The point here is that these are all great as long as they aren’t taken too far, which most of us have done with at least one of the examples.
Sadly, I often succumb to #5. But hey, admitting is the first step to recovery, right?? It’s just those damn lumpy should pads on my traps… argh!!
I think “men’s style” in general can easily go too far but this site has always been pretty good about keeping things reasonable – keep up the good work!
44mm is the max for my watch diameter and I used to use too much hair product…now I have not hair
Here’s the thing about #5:
Nobody notices that your sleeves are 1/8th inch too long or short, or that the waist of your jacket needs to be taken in by 1/4th of a centimeter.
Unless you spend your entire day motionlessly posing for amateur fashion photobloggers then NOBODY will know the difference between really-well fitting and textbook-perfect fitting.
We live our lives in motion. We put our hands in our pockets and cross our arms. We sit down and stand up. We walk, jog, even run (because the next train is in 15 minutes and we have to be at work in 10). Our clothes move with and sometimes without us. We are not mannequins.
Nobody notices.
More importantly, nobody cares.
“Keep some kink in there.”
~Joe on pant break and marriage.
Thanks for this and providing some sober context, Joe. While good fit is paramount, I really think some have become a bit obsessive about it … talking about 1/8th of an inch of tailoring on cuffs or jacket shoulders just seems a bit crazed to me. As if anyone but the wearer would notice. It’s a bit like shelving your canned goods in alphabetical order. Nice but inessential.
Whether you intended it or not, you struck on a major issue with male style … which I think is that too many are dressing to impress their peers in the online style community rather than for themselves and the real world. You can dress somewhere in the middle between conservative and dandy and look just fine. Having said that, to each their own.
#8!
Fortunately for me, I never live like a real man, seeing as my actions are modeled after Captain Ahab.
#6… Looking “too sculpted?” Seriously? What about those of us who have 40″ chests and 29″ waists? Tailors exist for a reason. Nothing wrong with being in exceptional shape.
Women have been dressing for the sake of other women for hundreds of years. Just an observation.
Number 7 can be challenge for some of us when you fall between sizes. 34×32 is almost always too long, and 34×30 is often not long enough. I shudder at the thought of paying to tailor every pair of pants I own. So I just pick one or the other and just live with it.
I feel like the reddit thing from #8 wasn’t all that bad. The guy’s just talking about how he wants to take control of his life and start working instead of wishing, nothing too overly “manly” like “I’ll hunt and kill everything I eat, grow a manly beard, build a log cabin, and conquer every woman in this world”.
Whatever motivates him to take responsibility of his own life is all good in my books.
Well said. We run the risk of losing the forest for the trees
I’m 43″ with a 33″ waist. And yeah, a lot needs to be tailored. But you can still overdo it. That’s the whole point of this post–not going too far.
Must be nice. I do have to hem every single pant and jean. At this point, I really shoulda bought a sewing machine and figured it out. I’d be a millionare!
Sadly, most don’t know the difference between well fitting and ill fitting.
So they want other women leering at their cleavage? 🙂 Thanks for clarifying, I thought females dressed to attract male suitors.
Common misconception. You might have to just trust me on this. 🙂
” or that the waist of your jacket needs to be taken in by 1/4th of a centimeter”
Shoot! My waist size changes more than that after a good bowel movement. 😛
Haha, I will trust your judgement. Still, don’t see many men here raising their hands and admitting they are dressing to impress other men.
First draft for #2: “Yes you’re supposed to match your leathers (shoes, belt, watchstrap, cat o’ nine)”
Or an epic breaking of wind.
re: number #8: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_EzDRpkfaO4
By the way, I saw this on the AoM Pinterest board, so even they can poke a little fun at obsessing over this abstract concept of manliness. Do it, just don’t take it too seriously.
Good article Joe. Personally I think the ankle bearing has reached preposterous levels at this point. I’m all for a clean limited or no break but things have gotten rediculous. In three years when this trend has died down I think a lot of dudes will have a lot of pants they aren’t so keen on wearing.
#8 – Absofu*kinglutely. Well put.
#5 – very true. Still, 1/4 inch in sleeve length can be the difference between a bit of shirt sleeve showing or not, and that’s a noticeable difference. Sleeves and pantlegs are worth it!
I could be wrong, but I suspect that 29″ is your pant size and not your waist size. For instance, I have a 33 inch waist and I wear size 30×30 in pants. If you actually have a 29″ waist you would be wearing 26 or 27 in pant waist sizes and would likely never find your size in men’s clothing departments. I just mention this because vanity sizing is a pet peeve of mine and most people who don’t regularly read clothing blogs don’t really know about it.
feel free to tell me that is incorrect and i’m an ass for assuming it, of course.
I purchased a 47mm panerai-type watch online and had all sorts of regret about the size. It actually ended up looking great and I receive a ton of compliments. I think it’s all relative. That size in that style worked for my 6’6″ frame. I say take a risk. I normally stick to 40-42mm. You never know what might work.
“Keep some kink in there” This is fine advice for life in general.
Oh myyyy…! Still, the truth – you speaketh it. Hell, I nearly went down a full pants size following this morning’s cup of coffee. TMI? Likely.