Dappered

Affordable Men's Style

  • Don’t Miss Anything
  • Start Here
  • Essentials Shop
  • Latest Deals
  • Style Scenarios
  • Reviews

6 signs you’re not in a good cocktail bar

June 1, 2012 By Official Bartender Michael Bowers | Heads up: Buying via our links results in us getting a commission (not always, but just about), which helps keep the lights on around here. We also take your privacy rights seriously. Head here to learn more.

Originally Published 1/3/12

For better or worse, the craft cocktail movement seems to have reached the tipping point—Rachel Maddow can be found mixing Bijou’s with Jimmy Fallon and you can (though you probably shouldn’t) order a Caipirinha at the Cheesecake Factory.  But with the proliferation of bars with ambitions beyond the bottom line there are perils.

Just because a place presents itself as a craft cocktail bar doesn’t mean they actually know how to make a good cocktail—and $12 for a drink can be a steep fee to find out.  Not so many years ago, decent cocktail bars could only be found in big cities, and even then they were hard to find.  Nowadays, there are countless bars, both in big cities and beyond, that serve top-notch cocktails.  Unfortunately there are as many or more bars that hope to cash in on the trend without the commitment, knowledge, or passion to pull it off.  So, how to tell the difference without blowing money on a round of sub-par libations?  These signs should help you know when to save your money and find a good dive bar instead:

#1 Vodka features prominently.

There is nothing in particular wrong with vodka, but it sure is boring.  Vodkas just aren’t very different from one another and every bottle in excess of two or three is just taking away space that could be allotted for more interesting spirits.

#2 Every drink has a dozen ingredients and you don’t know what any of them are.

These places are more interested in impressing you than in making good drinks.  It is no accident that some of the finest drinks in the canon contain no more the three or four ingredients. Often nothing more is required.

#3 There are –tinis and –ritas other than martinis and margaritas.

Chain restaurants, skeezy night clubs, magazines targeted at middle aged women, ironic 90s-themed parties—these are places where you can expect the syllables rita and tini to be appropriated as suffixes—not at serious cocktail bars.

#4 Anything is made with a commercial mix.

It’s no better than a restaurant serving you soup from a can.  If they can’t be bothered to squeeze their own citrus or build their own Bloody Mary’s there is no reason to expect them to expend anything greater than the least amount of effort required to please the lowest common denominator.

#5 There are bitters in every drink.

Years ago there was a phrase in the craft cocktail community that some people took a little too seriously—“Bitters makes everything better.”  Sure, they make a lot of drinks a heck of a lot better, but there is a time and place for them.  Bitters in cocktails are sort of like knit neckties—properly deployed they are a subtle way to make a strong impression, but use them with everything and you’ll seem like you’re more interested in appearances than taste.

#6 Nobody appears to be having much fun.

Some places just take themselves too seriously.  There is a difference between taking seriously the quality of ingredients, or the precision of measuring, or the size and shape of ice, and taking oneself seriously.  The former ensures great drinks; the latter ensures self-important service, and—though the drinks might be delicious—a bar is more than its beverages.

About our Bartender – Michael Bowers is the Head Bartender at the Modern Hotel and Bar in Boise, Idaho.  His patrons know him for the uncanny precision with which he tends his bar.  Michael’s cocktails have been noted by, among others, Food and Wine, Sunset Magazine, and the New York Times.  See more in The Drink archive.  Top photo credit: elvissa

Not Michael, and not his bar.

Filed Under: Dappered Classics, Drink Tagged With: bitters, cocktails, martini, Michael Bowers, The Drink, vodka

Continue the Conversation …

Want to share your thoughts on this article? Send us a tweet, join the discussion on Facebook, or hit us up on Instagram!

Don’t Miss Anything

Subscribe via email to get articles in your inbox or add Dappered on Flipboard. You can also follow us on Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram. Or subscribe to push notifications to get alerts immediately.

New Here?

Well, welcome to Dappered. Here are what we consider the most useful posts on the site if you're looking to put a little more effort into your appearance. Just want to see our favorite menswear products? Shop our essentials here.

J. Crew: 40% off select full + additional 40% off final sale

J. Crew: 40% off select full + additional 40% off final sale

New spring arrivals too. Linen shirts, suede chukkas, pocket squares, polos, and tees.

Style Scenario: Feels like Spring – Casual (nothing over $100 edition)

Style Scenario: Feels like Spring – Casual (nothing over $100 edition)

Lots of sales. Nothing over $100. The first of three style scenarios as we transition to warmer weather clothes.

Steal and Stock Alert: Seiko 5 Sports GMT 20% off

Steal and Stock Alert: Seiko 5 Sports GMT 20% off

It’s back again. For now. Until it’s not. Normally $475 and out of stock. Now in stock and $380.

Follow Dappered on Instagram »

Men’s Fashion or Affordable Style?

Men's Fashion or Affordable Style?

Fashion is temporary and expensive. Style is timeless and affordable. Dappered® helps you work the retail system so that you can be comfortable, look sharp, and save money.

Want to share a great product? Email Us.
For a fit perspective, see Joe's measurements.
Make sure to read our affiliate disclosure.

CONNECT WITH DAPPERED

Thanks! Check your inbox or spam folder to confirm your subscription.

  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • RSS
  • Twitter

Most Popular on Dappered

  • Seiko 5 Sports Divers, Target’s Spring Home Sale, & More – The Thurs. Men’s Sales Handful
  • Steal and Stock Alert: Seiko 5 Sports GMT 20% off
  • 10 Best Bets for $75 or Less – Cheap Sunglasses, Affordable Tech Pants, & More
  • Style Scenario: Sleek Athleisure (nothing over $100 edition)
  • Steal Alert: 25% off select Hamilton, Seiko, and Timex watches at Macy’s
  • Monday Men’s Sales Tripod – Allen Edmonds Extra 20% off F2s, New BR Sale items, & More

Popular Topics

  • Best dress shirts to own
  • Best looking watches under $100
  • Best men’s dress shoes under $200
  • Nike Killshot sneaker alternatives
  • How to wear a suit without a tie
  • Suitsupply store review
  • Suitsupply Blue Line review
  • J. Crew Factory Thompson suit review
  • How much does it cost to tailor a suit?
  • Dopp kit essentials
  • Brown shoes with gray pants
  • Men’s style buying guide

Copyright © 2023 Dappered.com | Dappered, LLC | Dappered® is a registered trademark of Dappered, LLC

Hat tip: Magazine Pro Theme On Genesis Framework

Dappered does not collect or sell its users personal information | Disclosures: Privacy and Affiliates, Gilt.com, FTC

WPE

We work with partners that use cookies to understand how visitors use our site. Find out more.