Ask A Woman: Thoughts on what bigger guys should wear this summer?
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Hello Beth,
As an overweight man, what are some fashion mistakes that I need to stay away from this summer? What colors or styles can be more slimming for a man of “healthier” proportions?
– Douglas
Hello Douglas,
I write this response on what is technically the first day of summer. Technically. Where is summer, Douglas? Where is it? Maybe you have summer at your house, but summer has not arrived at my house. I want sunshine and clear skies. Is anyone in this Godforsaken hemisphere experiencing summer? What’s that? I should stop bitching and stick to fashion? Fine. When I die from Vitamin D deficiency, you’ll feel really badly that you weren’t concerned.
Everyone, no matter weight, should consider their shape and size when dressing themselves; this not just a rule for our fuller fellow fashionistos. Dark colors are slimming; light colors are not. However, given the warm temperatures, I doubt you want to walk around in head-to-toe black and navy blue from June to August. So, when choosing your outfits, pay attention to your proportions.
- Are you heavier on top, or bottom? If you carry much of your excess weight in your mid-section, for instance, you want to avoid a dark bottom with a light top, because that will slim your bottom half while accentuating your top half, making you appear even more top-heavy.
. - If you carry your weight spread equally across your body… you might try a monochromatic look. This means you dress in one color from top to bottom, and usually in the same shade of that color, though a bit of variance is fine. This look can be slimming if you’re pretty well-proportioned. And, you could try it out with the lighter colors of summer.
As far as styles or cuts go, it’s all good news. Clothing companies have finally, in the last five to ten years, realized that people of all shapes and sizes are interested in well-made, stylish clothing, and thus they’ve tailored many of the trendier styles to fit and flatter large sizes. Remember when skinny jeans first came out? The only people who could wear them were models. Literally. They were skintight, low-cut, severely tapered. Gradually, they became accessible to many more body types, with higher cut waists, looser fits, and kinder silhouettes. So don’t be afraid to wear the styles you’re seeing in magazines and on runways. Do be realistic about what looks good on you, however. Bring a girlfriend or sister or friend shopping with you who will honestly tell you whether or not you can pull off the look you’re going for.

Other random tidbits to consider as you shop: pleats always add bulk (plus, let’s be real, they’re so heinous-looking) so stick to flat front pants; vertical stripes are most slimming, but if you love horizontal stripes, stick to thin stripes (See right).
Finally fit, fit, and fit (and I say this to EVERYONE). Make sure your clothing fits well. Do NOT wear bulky clothing in an effort to “hide” your size. Conversely, make sure buttons aren’t straining on your dress shirts, and that you can comfortably zip up your pants. Clothing should skim, not cling.
You’ll notice I didn’t link to any websites above for examples of plus-size men in plus-size clothing…that’s because while I did find a number of sites that cater to bigger guys, the photos on the websites are still of slim men, so that’s not very helpful (hey clothing companies, why not show your actual target shopper modeling the clothes?!?). But, there are a ton of stores you’re already familiar with that have “Big & Tall” sections to their websites: here, here, here, here, and here. And guys, please post links below if you know of other great sites with plus size clothing–I’d love to add them to my arsenal of advice-giving information.
Happy shopping Douglas! (And if you see summer, tell him to stop by my place…I’ll leave the light on.)
-Beth
Got a question for Beth? Send them to: askawoman@dappered.com
Good advice, Beth.Douglas should TRY ON clothes in the store and if he has the least bit hesitation as to whether he feels comfortable, whether he would actually wear something, then he should avoid it. Fortunately styles these days go toward shirts worn outside the pants, which I think is good for the big guys.
As a dude, and as a previously-very-overweight, still-got-some-weight-to-lose dude, I appreciate the article. Knew most of that, but hadn’t heard the monochrome advice…unfortunately, I’m so stylistically against monochrome, I just can’t do it, even if it would benefit me.
I also, as I might have mentioned here before, suggest people check out the quite entertaining documentary fat-head. It streams on netflix. There’s good reason to believe that the medical profession doesn’t know as much as it thinks/says it does about weight loss, and the vilification of fats/championing of carbs can be traced back to money, special interests, and politics. It’s an intriguing story, at least. For extra reasons on why to distrust (or at least be wary of) “experts,” (especially those in the medical and financial fields) listen to/read Nassim Taleb (Black Swan, Fooled by Randomness), and his interviews on http://www.econtalk.org.
A’ight, enough soapboxing.
I would highly recommend the lecture by Robert H. Lustig, MD, “Sugar: The Bitter Truth.” You can find it on youtube.
…anyone know where to find the “Aspartame: The Bitter Truth” video?
Pretty good advice, although I don’t care for the monochromatic look, especially when it’s black. Most people just don’t look good in head to toe black. I had a black suit years ago and ending up giving it away after wearing it 5-6 times.
And yes, the medical community is so far behind the times when it comes to healthy eating it is not even funny. Doctors still encourage “healthy” whole grains and demonize eggs and fats. It’s a farce.
I do recommend Dr. Mercola’s daily newsletter. I know some people dismiss him as a quack but I agree with the majority of what he says, at least regarding diet.
I’ll trade places with you Beth. I’m in Oklahoma and it’s been in the triple digits lately. It’s been over 90 and humid since around April. And I have no relief to look forward to until at least October. I hate my life.
What Raymond said. Wanna’ come live in Florida, Ms. Beth McChilly?
This is why I love living in the mountains…. “Hot” for us is in the 70s-80s, with low humidity and a lovely, persistent breeze. Still feeling warm? No worries, just wait for the sun to set and the temp will drop about 20 degrees.
Of course, we also have 9-month winters, but that’s not such a bad thing if you like skiing and dressing in layers.
gotta give it it for the skiing! yeah!
I’m a big guy, and I can find a lot of stuff at casualmale.com and their brick and mortar stores. Some stuff will be awful, but you can find some good stuff.
Unfortunately, the biggest problem with being a larger dude is that we CAN’T try things on in store. I’m well proportioned, but have a huge frame and the only department store that even carries my size in store is JCPenney’s, and occasionally Marshalls. Trying things on is out of the picture.
What I CAN recommend, however, is shopping anyway – I go to Kohl’s, look at all the clothes closely, then take a camera phone shot and find the item online – many items are carried in larger sizes online, and if you buy from a retailer with a brick and mortar (Kohls/Macy’s etc.) you can often return things that don’t fit directly to a store instead of playing the shipping game.
I tend to shop online more than in-store, but I only choose online retailers that have physical locations near me so returns are easier. This way I can play the trial and error game til I find something that fits well and that I like. After awhile, you become very familiar with designers and how they cut their clothes. Having the knowledge will save a ton of time and frustration.
Your onto the right track and changing your life. Read “Why We Get Fat” or “Good Calorie, Bad Calorie” and check out the documentary “Fathead” in addition to Todd’s suggestion. Leangains.com and “The Primal Blueprint” are the bibles on how to get jacked cutup. Once you go primal, you’ll never go back. Good job and good luck!