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Do women really like men’s butts?

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Ask A Woman: What to do if you’ve got a flat ass.

If you’ve got a question that needs the female treatment, chances are you’re not the only one who wants to ask it. Beth is our source for the answers. From opinions on men’s style to decoding the sometimes mysterious ways of women, she’ll take on a different question every Thursday. And don’t worry, your identity will be protected too. Click here to get to know Beth, then get in touch with her by sending your question to: askawoman@dappered.com
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Beth:

I’ve got a serious pancake butt.  Women always seem to pay special attention to a guy’s butt, but I doubt any woman would call my flat rear “cute.”  Are butts REALLY that big of a deal to women?  Don’t women pay more attention to a guy’s arms, shoulders, chest, etc?  Those things I have control over with time spent working out.  But my glutes… they’re really a lost cause.

– Jeremy

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Hi Jeremy,

Congratulations on being the first reader to make me laugh out loud.  I had to write about this as soon as I got the email.  It’s so honest and vulnerable.  Way to stick your neck (butt?) out, Jeremy.

Women and men are more similar than MTV, Oprah, and that guy who keeps writing those crap relationship books about Mars and Venus, would have you think.  Most people have a feature they look for in the opposite sex: height, boobs, ass, arms, hair, and so on.  The preferences are as varied as the people themselves.  Yes, there are some women who look for a great butt, which for men in our current culture is generally defined as perky and muscular.  Other women don’t care about that at all and want to see rock-hard thighs.  It’s no different than a man who prefers slim women, whereas another man might want a gal with curves you could ski over.

Even if a woman has certain physical preferences for her mate, I truly believe there are very few women who would reject a guy based on a single attribute like the quality of the butt, especially since it sounds like you take care of your other, ahem, parts.

I suspect you believe that “women always seem to pay special attention to a guy’s butt” because you’re sensitive about your own.  You are probably hyper-aware of comments about butts, but don’t even notice the number of times women talk about a man’s great smile or muscular forearms.  Still feel bad?  Consider Cher.  Girlfriend has been a pioneer in the field of plastic surgery and follows an extreme fitness regimen, and she still has a pancake butt.  You’re in good company, my friend.

-Beth

Got a question for Beth? Send them to: askawoman@dappered.com

Comments

  1. Hahaha. It would be interesting to see if the tag “pancake butt” brings any traffic to this article :).

    Beth gives good advice, but the butt situation is not out of your control. There are plenty of workouts that target the glutes, and some activities too. I got a new road bicycle this summer and put some serious pedaling mileage into it before the days started getting shorter (I work late so don’t have much daylight left these days after work). For the first couple weeks my butt hurt A LOT after a good ride, and not because of the seat. Over time it hurt less and I became less sore, which obviously means only one thing: I was building up muscles there.

    One thing to note about the biking thing though, I started off on a mountain bike and noticed no such changes/soreness. I only noticed it once I started to like enough to buy the more expensive road-specific bike. This is probably because of the more aggressive stance you sit in on a road bike which puts you in optimal alignment to use all your lower body muscles. Biking is a lot of fun, especially when done in a group or with a partner. You can easily be biking and realize you have been going for 2 hours and traversed 30+ miles, resulting in 1400+ calories burned. It’s a little bit of an investment but most of us have a mountain bike we could try it out on (note however that the difference between a mountain bike and road bike is literally night and day).

    Anyways, I went on a tangent a little, but bottom line: don’t give up hope! 🙂

  2. Great response Beth! I used to be super self conscious about my little girl hands and my butt chin now I have grown to love them because of two different girlfriends that loved them in the past.

  5. I agree with the above comment. Glutes are just like every other muscle in the body. If you give them some proper training (like doing some deadlifts or squats),they will grow and develop.

    I’m tired of seeing birdmen in the weight room working on their chests and arms while their tiny little legs are atrophying away.

  6. Jeremy, get a pair of extra thick hiking socks, roll them up, stuff them down the front of your drawers, NOBODY will notice your butt one way or another.

  7. Hi all.have recently aquired a bigger harder butt,recently  meaning last 12 months,
    did it purely by chance started using a twist stepper 20 mins a day for cardio,
    worked very well for me,hope this helps some.