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Animal shakes, the NFL skates, Athletes rate and the brass section breaks.

October 4, 2013 By Tim Johnstone | Heads up: Buying via our links may result in us getting a commission. Here's why.

THE HOLIDAYS ARE RIGHT AROUND THE CORNER (HINT ²) :

animal

At least one of you just squealed when with delight upon seeing this. You’re welcome.

IF YOU HAVE EVER HAD A SERVICE/RETAIL JOB…then you surely understand the total and complete horse-hockey that is the maxim “the customer is always right.” Eff that. This is unbelievable. Thanks to Dappered reader Joe G. for the tip.

STUDLY AND STYLIN: Complex.com has assembled their take on the Top 25 Best Dressed Athletes of the moment. I’m a fan of #25 (really? only #25?), #22, #8 and #7. But I’m the music guy so, yeah. We’ll let this guy have the last say here.

THERE IS NOT ENOUGH EVIL IN THE WORLD…that can be directed against these people. Also, the people who are the demand in this supply and demand situation. They’re worse.

I <3 RUSSIAN DASHCAMS!

You must be patient. Take in the euro-chillwave soundtrack. Appreciate the nonchalant joie-de-vivre of the worker. The sudden gratefulness and respect for our crumbling infrastructure. And the awesomeness that is that dude’s total commitment to rocking the moose knuckle. And that’s completely ignoring the obvious.

I HAD NO IDEA: The NFL is a non-profit entity? I think I have a problem with this.

TRUTH IN ADVERTISING: This really probably would be scary. But not for the reasons you might think. Also, not for me, but, you know, you should totally do it.

MANNERS AND CLASS: I can already sense the eye-rolls and the arched brows, but this right here. You never lose doing this. It will come as no surprise that I like what’s going on over here too.

BOTTOMS UP: Your one stop beerporium. Now I’m thirsty.

SOVIET STYLE:

sovietheadgear

Circa 1917: Soviet aircraft scouts.

HOW WRONG IS IT…that I kind of want to totally hate this guy? I mean, c’mon man. You’re killing me.

HORN O’PLENTY: You just kind of feel bad knowing that this kid will never ever hear the end of this.

THE LATEST IN WATCHES: One extreme. The other. And in between. Personally, I’m sitting this one out. Meh.

BEST. WEDDING. VIDEO. EVER:

For a certain generation of the readership…this is gold.

OH THAT’S NASTY: Maybe I should have known all this or at least remembered some of this but damn, Scurvy was some terrible business. But this right here? That’s the most spectacularly useful nasty I’ve ever encountered.

HEY ALANIS: Now this is ironic. With the added aroma of Karma in the air.

YOUR LIFEHACK OF THE WEEK: If you are concerned about your privacy where it comes to your smart phone, this might be helpful if you just upgraded to i07.

BUT WAIT, THERE’S MORE: Lifehack, the sequel. I knew about #’s 4, 5, 9, 13 and 14. I am going to try and remember #’s 1, 8, 18 and 29. I call baloney-smokes on #23.

THE HOLIDAYS ARE RIGHT AROUND THE CORNER PART II (HINT ²)

playskolshowcam

This is Playskool’s new toy for kids that parents all around the country will keep for themselves. And I am going to beat all of them to the damn toy emporium for this. It’s a combination video camera and projector. It comes with some kid-friendly digital FX. But it has USB connectivity. I guarantee you some indie-rock band will have “the first video made entirely with” clip on you tube sooner rather than later.

IS IT ME…or is this butting up against tin-foil-hat territory? Do I need some schooling here? I’m serious.

SAY WHAT? This right here is fascinating. Linguists have decided they believe they know what people talked like between 4500 BC and 2000 BC. They call it Proto-Indo-European. And now you can experience the reading of a brief parable abut a sheep and a horse in said language here.

GROUND CONTROL TO MAJOR TOM: This sounds like not-so-much fun.

EVER HAVE ONE OF THOSE DAYS?

whowhatme

Need something else to read?

  • I’m probably not so great at this, but there is hope for you.
  • I have so much to learn. You know about this stuff, right?
  • Also, this right here.

Filed Under: Etc. Tagged With: dossier

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That’s 57.5% off for those of you playing along at home. From flashy patterns to the most basic of basics.

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Zombies, conversations with everyone, and diving deeper into the advertising industry.

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Comments

  1. John P. says

    October 4, 2013 at 6:06 AM

    So there won’t be a Christina Hendricks gif every week? Oh…

  2. Furious Styles says

    October 4, 2013 at 7:35 AM

    I don’t think it’s been mentioned on Dappered yet, but the October issue of Details magazine had an interesting article on “Are You Too Old For Your Outfit?” We don’t talk age/style on Dappered, but it’d be interesting to consider at what age to stop trying to be trendy.

    http://www.details.com/style-advice/rules-of-style/201310/older-men-not-dressing-age-appropriate

  3. Dan J. says

    October 4, 2013 at 7:51 AM

    Alton Brown of Food Network fame has a wonderful interview with Atlanta style maven Sid Mashburn on last week’s podcast: http://www.nerdist.com/2013/09/the-alton-browncast-14-sid-mashburn/

  4. Loscv29 says

    October 4, 2013 at 8:14 AM

    I cant take any “best dressed” list seriously when it puts Russel Westbrook ahead of Wade.

    The “We are Brothers” track…. Holy crap SYNTH HEAVEN!!

    As always, Tim…. great work.

  5. Dan J. says

    October 4, 2013 at 8:25 AM

    As someone who’s fast approaching half a century, I fully agree with much of this article. There’s nothing sadder than someone my age trying to dress like they’re still in their 20’s. However, concerning the link to aging rockers, I think they miss the mark once or twice. I would never, ever dress like Steven Tyler but he owns his outfits, regardless of his age. I also don’t have any issue with Chris Cornell’s hair. His clothes could do with some help but the hair is fine for who and what he is. I do agree that the alt-rockers who are still sporting asymmetric haircuts are in serious need of an intervention.

  6. Joe says

    October 4, 2013 at 9:29 AM

    It’s mind numbing that the NFL is considered a non profit organization. I’m having a hard time wrapping my brain around it.

  7. Sigtweed & Corduroy says

    October 4, 2013 at 10:30 AM

    Read my mind friend…

  8. Loscv29 says

    October 4, 2013 at 10:57 AM

    NCAA is as well.

  9. SirNuke says

    October 4, 2013 at 11:38 AM

    While the NFL doesn’t pay income tax, the NFL teams themselves pay taxes. While I support removing the NFL’s non profit status, it’s not some super sketchy loophole.

    That said, there are a lot of road bumps with taxing the NFL. Do teams still have to pay taxes, meaning they get hit twice? Does this mean only states hosting NFL employees (so New York) rather than team employees get a cut of the income tax?

  10. Joe says

    October 4, 2013 at 11:52 AM

    I’m sure they can figure it out 🙂

  11. Timotao says

    October 4, 2013 at 12:28 PM

    Here’s the thing> you have BILLIONAIRE owners demanding tax breaks and special deals from cities for their new stadiums. This is one of the things that gets me.

  12. Joe says

    October 4, 2013 at 1:25 PM

    100% agree. See the Miami Marlins.

  13. odinbearded says

    October 4, 2013 at 4:31 PM

    The ivory ban has been a bigger failure than the war on drugs. Simply having the government trying to stop poaching has clearly and unequivocally failed. Every avenue we’ve pursued has failed, massively.

    To help elephants, end the outright ban on ivory trade. Grant “farming” status to the locals, who will now have their own tremendous incentive to protect the resource. Use DNA tagging to identify and track ivory shipments and sales.

    Then start a major push into bioengineering. Without legal avenues for ivory, there’s no incentive to find better ways to grow ivory and protect elephants.

  14. BenR says

    October 4, 2013 at 4:35 PM

    I know cops who would probably use this as pretext to pull someone over (“reckless driving – did not have both hands on the wheel”).

  15. TJ says

    October 4, 2013 at 7:58 PM

    Love that wedding video. As for the returns story, I know exactly what you are talking about. I used to work in retail and one time I had a woman return a 10 year old pair of pants that had holes in them and had been hemmed. I had to take the return. We used to also get people who would steal a lot of stuff, usually jewelry and jeans (so easy to steal) and then come back later and return them for store credit. I had to take them, I wasn’t allowed to stop them. Even when I would call a manager or LP, they had to take the return. It was ridiculous. We did start to swipe people’s ID’s so they would be tagged though.

  16. odinbearded says

    October 5, 2013 at 7:21 AM

    The NFL organizes for-profit entities. Without those entities, it wouldn’t exist. It doesn’t create value as an organization on its own since at its core, it is just a rule-making body.

    It’s like a local Chamber of Commerce advertising and promoting local businesses or sponsoring events. Or like a Farmers Market. Their only value is in the coordinated actions of other entities.

  17. Joe says

    October 5, 2013 at 8:47 AM

    Precisely. Comparing the NFL to a Farmers Market = mind numbing.

  18. odinbearded says

    October 5, 2013 at 9:22 AM

    They’re essentially the same business model*. You set the rules, bring in people to do the actual work, and you advertise. The only difference is scale.

    *Farmers markets are usually 501(c)3 exempt, because they emphasize the community benefits. But otherwise it’s similar.

  19. Dappa says

    October 5, 2013 at 12:28 PM

    BTW, there is a rogue J.crew 25% code running around (somewhat secretly since Tuesday) that applies to everything including suits AND 3rd party items: INSTYLE25. They may switch back at any time, though, since it seems like maybe they didn’t mean to include “everything”.

    …But having said that I probably wouldn’t order anything myself since their fall suits are now ridiculously expensive: it’s routinely $450-550 just for the suit jacket! Every year they seem to increase the overall price by $30-60, so now 25% off for $700-800 suits only makes it to mid $500 to $600, which is how it should’ve been in the first place…

  20. Joe says

    October 5, 2013 at 12:32 PM

    Yes, I fully understand the model. We’re not disagreeing here.

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