Originally Published 8/29/2011
Like Chinese water torture or Rudy
1. Wearing a Pocket Square
Wearing a pocket square, especially casually, can be like learning how to drive a stick shift. It can be weird as hell at first and downright awkward. But after you get the hang of it, you’re glad you did and it sets you apart. Pocket squares came roaring back with Mad Men and have since tapered off. Consider sticking with them.
2. How you lace your shoes
95% of men are walking around with their shoes laced up in the same criss crossed way that we all learned in Kindergarten. And there’s no harm in that whatsoever. If you want your shoes, especially your dress shoes, to have a much cleaner look, take a look at Ian’s Shoelace Site and specifically his tutorial on bar lacing.
3. Ignoring your mobile phone in public
Every spare second shouldn’t be used to play Angry Birds or to check in with twitter. If you’re standing in line for a cup of coffee, resist the urge to reach for your smartphone. Who knows, maybe you’ll catch the eye of the Barista, you two will fall in love and get married, and one day when you’re out enjoying a small meal and drinks at a favorite bar, you can ignore your phone again when she excuses herself to go to the bathroom. Because if you don’t and she comes back to find you still locked into Angry Birds, then you’ll have a problem.
4. Knowing how to tie more than one necktie knot
Yay for the four-in-hand. It’s a fine knot. But if you want a knot that’s more substantial, it’s nice to know how to tie a half or (brace yourselves) full windsor. Or, if you want something just a bit bigger than the 4iH? Try a Kelvin.
5. Using Collar Stays. As often as possible.
A limp and lifeless collar isn’t quite as bad as a limp and lifeless handshake, but it sure doesn’t help make a good impression. Avoid shirts without slots for collar stays or buttons to button down the collar. Seriously consider investing in Wurkin’ Stiffs.
Your turn guys. What else is a small detail that seems to make a big difference when it comes to style?
(1) Maybe a post about different ways to wear a pocket square? I’ve tried the straight fold seen here: http://www.samhober.com/howtofoldpocketsquares/flatpocketsquarefold.htm. It worked I guess, but I didn’t own it 100% (and it kept falling into the pocket). I think next time I might try the more casual “just throw it in there,” but that seems to draw so much attention to it.
(3) I so need to work on this! I think it’s a nervous habit more than anything.
(4) This. The four-in-hand is the worst knot ever, but 90% of guys have it. Even guys on TV who have stylists and make-up artists stick with that terrible crooked knot. My favorite is the Pratt know. Works great with slim ties (and keeps them symmetrical!).
(5) I don’t have many shirts with collar stays, but if you want an easy way to keep them looking crisp make sure they are buttoned all the way to the top on the hanger. You can also hang them with the plastic front thing you get front the dry cleaners. For bonus points, hang them with the cardboard collar stuffing you get when you buy the shirt.
For polo shirts, hang them buttoned up with the collar popped. It will give the collar structure when you wear it and not look flat or lifeless.
re: tie knots, always assumed the half windsor was the default (was for me anyway). Don’t like the four in hand b/c its too skinny/tight. Full windsor is my go too with any sort of spread collar.
Same here. I’ve tried out the FIH in the mirror a few times and the asymmetry makes it look like crap.
Agreed. The four in hand works well for a knit tie though.
The asymmetry, done right, is the appeal of the FIH. If you’re looking for a fuller knot, go with the double FIH. It’s the ticket.
http://dieworkwear.com/post/4395861372/double-four-in-hand
Some people have jobs where you need to check your phone (email, not twitter/Angry Birds) on a regular basis. Obviously, agreed there are times when you shouldn’t check it non-stop (e.g., at dinner, on a date or during a movie), but in line at Starbucks probably isn’t one of them.
What’s number two?
What’s number two?
Well if you’re an important person with an important job like that, it’s fine. However, most of us are on twitter, reading celebrity tweets or sharing Dappered posts with our followers and trying to look busy/important.
For the equivalent to Ian’s Shoelace Stie, take a look at Thomas Fink’s Encyclopedia of Tie Knots: http://www.tcm.phy.cam.ac.uk/~tmf20/tieknots.shtml
They correspond to the numbers in the post. I didn’t really have anything to say about shoe laces.
Here’s a cheap, quick pocket square solution: check the liner fabric inside the chest pocket on your blazers. Last week, I couldn’t find a pocket square, so I reached into the pocket and inside-outed it to reveal a beautiful striped navy satin material that I then arranged to look like a pocket square. I received many compliments on it, and nobody noticed its false nature. Obviously, not all jackets are going to have liner fabrics that look good like this, but you might get lucky.
I used to do bar lacing on closed laced oxfords but in the end I prefer criss-cross because bar lacing looks like you just took it out of a shoebox at a store…
That’s me right now! Although I’m on a lunch break!
I guess I’m of the British persuasion because I thought that knot looked like horse excrement. Purposely disheveled only works for hair, in my opinion.
I guess I’m of the British persuasion because I thought that knot looked like horse excrement. Purposely disheveled only works for hair, in my opinion.
The Dappered post sharing is OBVIOUSLY an exception. Carry on. (and thanks…)
I love the tie knot link! I lived in Minneapolis for several years and always wondered how Don Shelby did that sweet tie knot, now I know. Seriously, Don Shelby is hands down my favorite news guy of all time.
The four-in-hand is preferred for a reason. It elongates the face and its slight asymmetric kick helps keep it real. Windsor knots, as 007 once said, is the mark of a cad (His words! Not mine!), besides, unless your an NFL player, those large knots will dwarf your head, making it appear smaller. The half Windsor, though nice, is too stubby, and again, risks making its wearer’s head appear squat.
And knowing how to properly properly tie your shoelaces is one of those things I know people notice without their knowing they notice that they notice even though they totally do notice.
* you’re
Disagree! I love the 4IH BECAUSE it’s asymmetrical.
(I agree everywhere else though.)
I think you’re over simplifying. A four-in-hand works well for *some* ties with *some* shirts. To paint it as the *only* worthy knot is, frankly, missing the point entirely. I *personally* think a four-in-hand looks too small on spread collar shirts. I like spread collar shirts so what am I to do? Or do you think spread collar shirts are also not “keep[ing] it real” and we should all wear the same style of shirt collar also?
Remember, this is about *your* look after all so let’s not be so disparaging of what works for *other* people. Different folks for different strokes
Also, people may notice when you’ve tied your laces badly if they’re talking to your feet, but I guarantee in most social circles they’ll notice when you’ve tied your tie badly much more often.
Fantastic.
Yup. Agreed with you 100% here.
I’m a full windsor guy for life! I have kind of broad shoulders and a thick neck though, so it works for me. Plus, I feel the even symmetry is the only way to go under a suit jacket. The problem I find with the F/W is that most guys don’t know, or don’t take the time to make it look right. Smooth, even, fully rounded, and without dimples, (unless you do one intentionally). The trick is, tie it slow, and treat each step as a deliberate act. If you just do it all as one motion, it going to come outsloppy, because if the first loop isn’t neat the rest of it can’t go well.
Granted, I just happen to have a LOT of practice, since I’m former military and the F/W is the standard for the uniform.
I’m a full windsor guy for life! I have kind of broad shoulders and a thick neck though, so it works for me. Plus, I feel the even symmetry is the only way to go under a suit jacket. The problem I find with the F/W is that most guys don’t know, or don’t take the time to make it look right. Smooth, even, fully rounded, and without dimples, (unless you do one intentionally). The trick is, tie it slow, and treat each step as a deliberate act. If you just do it all as one motion, it going to come outsloppy, because if the first loop isn’t neat the rest of it can’t go well.
Granted, I just happen to have a LOT of practice, since I’m former military and the F/W is the standard for the uniform.
I’m not a fan of whatever that double FiH was and neither the FiH.. If not the Windsors, I go for the Pratt knot. Maybe you should give it a shot for your skinny(ish) ties
another quick thing you can do to stand out, shine your shoes (or have them shined)…really makes a great impact and keeps the shoes healthy.
I’m British and I use the double FiH almost exclusively.
I love the kind of discussion that these posts bring out. I would say “Lose the T-shirt as a top layer” If it’s a hot day, wear a polo. If it’s not so hot, layer with a T-shirt for some depth.
#3. Exactly. I have bemoaned the cultural loss of the sidewalk seduction for many years now. How can I catch the eye of a pretty lady when she’s glued to her iPhone? I suppose it’ll happen when I rescue her from oncoming traffic thanks to said iPhone.
The four in hand is probably my least favorite tie knot (we do agree on the Pratt, though) but I wouldn’t go as far as saying “worst ever.” There is a time and place for everything, even the four in hand.
People running down the 4IH because it’s anemic should give it a try with a thicker tie (thicker, not wider). I have a couple of wool/silk ties and a couple of 7-fold silks that need a 4IH or they make ginormous knots. The 4IH works perfectly.
I’ve come to prefer the Neapolitan knot (some call it the “nicky”) over the 1/2 or full windsor. It offers a similar symmetry, but because the blades start out reversed and the small blade stays that way, there’s a small flair of the unexpected.
If you like the asymmetry of the 4IH but feel it leaves too small a knot, try what some people call the “Calvin Klein” knot. Simply add an additional pass around the knot before the up, under and tuck.
When I was young, my dad (who was in the British Army) taught me how to tie a tie. He taught me the Windsor.
For years after I thought that was the only knot. I don’t believe I have ever tied my tie any other way!
#3 #3 #3 – It’s amazing what you’ll notice when you dislodge your face from your phone in public and just look around. Just people watch for a little bit.
It’s funny (i.e., sad), people think that the Disney movie Wall-e portrays a sad distant future where people go around all day with their face buried in a television screen. My friends, we’re already there…
If you’re under the age of 30, wear a watch. It kills me how many people my age and younger don’t wear them anymore.
I am shocked by the lack of love for the four in hand
I am curious about the advice against button-down collars. What is the reasoning behind this? Personally I quite like bd collars.
I think you misread it- he says avoid shirts without slots or buttons. So, Button Downs OK, nicer dress shirts with slots for stays, OK.
I wear button downs all the time. I never wear ties, it’s too formal for my work place, and I hate floppy collers. Button Down Oxford Cloth in all kinds of patterns for me.
Ah, I see how I misread that now. Thanks for catching that.
Re: straight bar lacing. Always loved the look. I tried it once, but the slightly shorter overall length of lace used left me with some goofy looking lace loops. Stock photos always show bar lacing, but the leftover lace always seems to be tucked in.
I was going to see if anyone had a fix for this, but it looks like Ian’s Shoelace Site offers some DIY aglet (apparently what shoelace tips are called) repairing options: http://www.fieggen.com/shoelace/agletrepair.htm This’ll have to be my project for this weekend.
Don’t check your phone in public, are you serious? People are busy and on the go, not to mention everyone else does it- nothing wrong with checking your phone unless you’re on a date or in an important meeting.
Until I become A, a senior partner; B, a Banker on Wall Street, or; C, grossly overweight, I will refrain from wearing a full or half Windsor knot. It looks absolutely ridiculous. I see 20 something and 30 something men wearing huge, baseball sized, and loosely tied, full Windsors to work and they look absolutely ludicrous. It looks as though their mother/girlfriend dressed them in the morning. Yes, I tie a four-in-hand. If you want a symmetrical knot tie a shelby, but for the love of God don’t tie one of those ridiculous loose bottomed shelbies.
Weirdest fascination with a local celebrity ever. You must have cried when he retired.
Add the double four-in-hand to that list. As easy as the four-in-hand with an extra wrap of the tie. Adds a bit of girth to your knot and it’s just as easy. Ian’s shoelace site has changed my life. I can never lace my shoes the normal way again and now I know why my knots always had the “bunny ears” sideways!
Finally purchased some Wurkin Stiffs today. Happened to find them at a Nordstrom Rack for just 13 bucks. Awesome investment, thanks to this site! Had been puttin’ it off for a while
My personal peeve is the vast amount of improperly hemmed pants. I understand that some people like more of a break than others but if if they look like elephant ankles, it isn’t so much of a break as a bag. Don’t even get me started on the ones so long that they fray in the back.
Love those magnetic collar stays, but they’re now only available in a box of 3 pair for $40! That’s puts it into the too-expensive-gimmick category…
Available for one pair for $14.95 at my local Nordstrom Rack. You might want to check it out if you have one nearby.
I never liked the 4IH – always done a half windsor but may have to try this Shelby thing out
I’m all about the Pratt Knot. I do straight bar lacing on my balmorals.
Wow just realized that my Uncle’s brother’s shoelace site is listed here. Awesome!