Bachelor Pad Deal breakers
Dappered recently assembled our resident panel of smart, beautiful, and down to earth women, to this time find out what women hate the most about bachelor pads. Those things about a guy’s place that are absolute deal breakers. The stuff that if she sees it in your home when she comes over, you’ll be from then on fighting an uphill battle for another date.
All our panelists are in their mid 20s to mid 30s and had no shortage of answers. Make these mistakes at your own risk:
1.Visible Porn
If you’re dumb enough that you fail to put away your adult entertainment before an honest to God real LIVE woman comes over, then you’re most likely hopeless. But this came up from the panel repeatedly. Is a stray magazine or video really that big of a deal? Yes. As Panelist Kelly said, this includes: “Playboys, posters, books, and videos. It’s disrespectful to me. If you want to be with me, I’m all you’re lucky to get.”
2. Dirty Bathrooms
If you’re hoping she’ll want to see those bits and pieces of you that most people normally don’t lay eyes on, you might not want to have a bunch of short and curly “previews” sticking to the rim of your toilet. Us men will do our business just about anywhere. Women will not. Respect that because if she has to go and doesn’t want to go in your place, she’ll definitely go. Somewhere else.
3. Mismatched Garage Sale Furniture
You’re not in college anymore. And if you are in college, try to make your place look like you’re not. A busted up old futon for a couch, and a ratty, chipped, falling apart entertainment center from 1974 isn’t sexy. Your date wants to be impressed with you. You, should want to impress her. If your place looks more like a Goodwill than a home, you might want to work on that. Because women usually don’t go to Goodwill to relax.
4. Multiple Video Game Consoles and Games strewn everywhere
There is some leeway on this one. Panelist Amber said: “One, or even two is tolerable, but more? I don’t want to date a “gamer”, sorry” Hide the porn, organize the video games. Just like you had to when you were living with your parents! And if you’re still living with your parents? Move out.
5. Bad Sheets
If you want to maybe, someday, entertain her in your bed… make it an inviting place. Women don’t want to have to worry about catching something from your homeless shelter ready blankets. From Panelist Juli: “A bachelor should have clean and decent sheets plus a good comforter set on his bed. There’s no better way to discourage a woman from ever picturing herself in your bed than having ugly or mismatched sheets.
Get a real sheet and comforter set. It doesn’t have to be fancy, keep it simple. But also, keep them clean, and make the bed before she comes over.
Avoid having any of those deal breakers visible and maybe she’ll step foot in your place once again.
I almost fell off my chair when reading this article – well done Dappered. The bear pelt blanket at the end was priceless.
Heck, call me whatever you want, but even I hate to see this stuff. Just don’t get too obsessed with it, you don’t want to end up like Jack from Fight Club.
That’s ridiculous. Girls don’t like garage sale furniture. Gotcha. So you want me to spend a lot of money so everything matches, but basically performs the same function.
How about $300 for a great looking couch, $400 for a stylish LEATHER Chair, and $70 for a really nice coffee table. Still too much?
Everything doesn’t have to be part of a set. It just has to look like something that didn’t come from the Youth Ranch or the alley behind your house.
Hey all, I am 24 (soon to be 25) and live with my parents. Not for the stereotypical reasons, though, I am trying to completely pay off my student loans in a timely manner. I have a good job, and have money, but 95% of it is going onto loans at the moment. I’m hoping to be out of here within 3 years, but in the meantime is there anything I can do to downplay that fact? Or am I doomed for the next 3 years 😛 I mention this because your article says “Still living with your parents? Move out.”
I know living with your parents is not much of a turn on, but I’m hoping a girl might be able to understand where I am coming from with this. Am I being naive?
Bryan,
I think it will be all about your confidence at this point. Are you proud that you’re paying off you debt? Are you proud of being fiscally responsible? Be confident in your ambitions and non-apologetic for where you are at this point. If living with your parents is a stepping stone for you as you move on to bigger and better things, then I think most women will appreciate that. Talk more about where you want to go, and what you want to do, than where you are right now. Women will stick around if they know you’re going somewhere, and you might just take them with you in the long run.
Amber, thanks so much for the advice. I appreciate it!
Bryan, the fact that you read this blog tells me that you’ve probably got other things going for you so you should be fine.
Yes. You live with your parents. Student loans tend to be low interest debt. What are you doing to do when it’s time to buy a car? Move back in with your parents?
That is 100x more than I paid for my second hand furniture, and my second hand furniture was still too expensive for me.
Edit: Well, this is three years old so nevermind.
Gamers don’t want to date shallow women either, so I would recommend doing the opposite of number 4.
Absolutely. I don’t have that kind of disposable income.
Interesting. This musta been posted somewhere else online since this post is more than a few years old.
Meanwhile, the point that the ladies make is still the same. Totally up to you to go cheap on the furniture. No skin off my nose. But it does make your place look a lot nicer. More here: http://dappered.com/2012/04/furnishing-your-place-the-guys-guide-to-inexpensive-furniture/
Lots of good comments/more suggestions from the readers there too.
Try Target. It’s still no $40 chair, and the leather is bonded/barely leather, but my club chairs are holding up great and they ran around $150. Meanwhile, it’ll take some digging, but Craigslist is a pretty good place for really cheap furniture. You might have to haggle and chase some wild geese.
Bottom line: Keep it as clean and simple as possible. Good luck guys.
It was posted to Reddit in the subreddit of r/MaleLivingSpace. Here’s the link if you want it: http://www.reddit.com/r/malelivingspace/comments/11mvyp/what_women_hate_about_bachelor_pads/
Sorry, Joe. I linked this to Reddit and now all these people who play video games all the time are upset that women don’t find gamers manly or attractive. You’re about to get flooded with bitter comments.
I’m sorry the women you’ve met have been so shallow. I am not a gamer.
I’m not sure if my comments needs to be approved or if my uni internet ate them, but that advice would have been far less degrading three years ago. Gaming is a lot more acceptable now.
Never apologize for linking a Dappered piece on Reddit! Reddit has sent us great traffic and a ton of great readers. Much appreciate the posting and honored you thought this old post was worth posting.
That said, I have to thank the ladies involved. They did a great job offering feedback.
1. Stop please
2. Everyone on this site does their absolute best not to argue/come off as snotty. So, know that. And as far as the “shallow” women go, I’m still great friends with all of the women who participated in this survey. None of which are shallow in the least. They said multiple systems with games “strewn everywhere.” This says more about your priorities and cleanliness to a woman (I think) than anything.
I don’t know you from a hole in the wall Jaz, but honestly dude, just playing the odds here, you’d be lucky as hell to end up with any one of them. And that stands even if you are a fantastic guy.
Welcome aboard.
hehe he posted that 3 years ago, it’s okay, he is out of there now!