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Men’s Clothes that Women Hate

January 5, 2010 By Joe | Heads up: Buying via our links may result in us getting a commission. Also, we take your privacy rights seriously. Head here to learn more.

Men’s Clothes that Women Hate

Dappered recently got together a panel of smart, beautiful, down to earth women.  We’ll call them Sarah, Juli, Tara, Amber, and Krista.  Because… that’s what their names are.  All in their mid 20s to mid 30s.  Our motive for assembling this panel of desirable women was to find out which items of men’s clothing women hate the most.

What do women find to be instantly unattractive when it comes to men’s style?  All their answers followed an unexpected theme.

The worst style mistakes men make seem to happen less when they’re oblivious to fashion as a whole, and more when they’re trying way to damn hard.  Here’s their top five.  See for yourself…

1. Skinny Jeans

Because they’re really only a few steps away from you wearing your Mom’s old stirrup stretch pants.  You’re a guy.  Not some music loving snood wearing gnarled hair chick from LA.  Give your groin some room.  Or as Panelist Amber put it: “I like to think that every man has muscular thighs and nice calves. Please don’t prove me wrong by wearing skinny pants.”  And as Panelist Tara put it: “Sweet baby Jesus put those away.”

There was no room at the inn for sweet baby Jesus.  There is no room in these pants for anything at all.
There was no room at the inn for sweet baby Jesus. There is no room in these pants for anything at all.

2. Deep V-Necks / Shirts that show Chest Hair

I still believe this was a marketing scam perpetrated by some penny pinchers at t-shirt companies looking to charge just as much for a shirt that uses 5% less cotton than a crew neck.  If you’re showing chest hair because you’ve got your shirt buttoned to a decent level, or it just so happens to be creeping out of the top of your t-shirt, then you’re hairy.  If you’re showing chest hair on purpose because you think it’s stylish, you’re gross.  Did you shampoo and condition your pectoral mane before you left the house?  Doesn’t matter.  You’re a clod.

Look at that face.  It says:  Don't have sex with me.  I'm a dirt bag.
Look at that face. It says: Don't have sex with me. I'm a dirt bag.

3. Necklaces

Too risky.  As Panelist Sarah put it:  “Necklaces kind of bother me.  You have to be a TOTAL rock star to pull it off.”  Not just a pseudo rock star.  Total.  Get it wrong and you’ve got more in common with this guy than you’d care to.

goldchainhairguy
I stole this from a Priest. Then I ate him.

4. White Club Shirts

Usually found with large collars and rolled up cuffs.  Also usually found on men who are awful in the sack but think they’re amazing, are mama’s boys, act like a tough guy in public, and may or may not have purchased GHB to help their “chances”.  The shirt shown here costs $150.  You are a dumb F*ck if you buy it.

So sexy it hurts.  Your soul.
Ooooh. I'd have sex with myself if I could. And would, if I never would have given up Yoga.

5. Too Much Cologne

Okay so it’s not an actual article of clothing… but it’s something you wear.  Some women like a hint of cologne.  Other women don’t like it at all.  Bathe regularly, wear decent deodorant, and eat foods that are healthy for you and you should most likely smell pretty good all on your own.  Do you wear enough that more than one person notices when you walk in a room?  Then that’s too much.

The brut covers the Mace from last night.
The brut covers the Mace from last night.

The lesson we can all take from this?  If you’re going to screw up, try less.  Better to be a Schlub than a Tool.  Women will see a Schlub as a guy with potential.  If you’re a tool, and you’re, uh… “rocking” more than a few of these deal breakers… you’re probably too much of a lost cause.

Good luck.  And seriously… lay off the damn cologne.

Filed Under: Clothing, Too Expensive, Women Tagged With: bad style, clothes women hate, clubs, cologne, deal breakers, deep v neck, men, necklace, schlub, skinny jeans, Tool

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Comments

  1. Sarah says

    January 6, 2010 at 9:12 AM

    I think the only man on earth that might be able to pull all of these things off is Johnny Depp. So if you’re not Johnny Depp don’t do any of these things.

  2. Johnny Depp says

    January 6, 2010 at 5:09 PM

    Glad to know I can pull it off. Now where did I put my knit cap that I wear to cover my greasy hair?

  3. Tergiversator_Maximus says

    March 3, 2011 at 10:42 PM

    Sooo…. hipsters?

  4. Alex says

    April 19, 2011 at 8:26 AM

    At one time I would change my clothes at least 5 times while getting ready to go out on the town, now if they keep me warm I could,nt give a toss what they look like. Anyway my bird pulling days are over and I love the wife and I do try to look good when I am out with her :),
    Just my ten cents worth on this subject
    Alex

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