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August 8, 2014 By Tim Johnstone | Heads up: Buying via our links may result in us getting a commission. Here's why.

IT’S ALL ABOUT THE ACCESSORIES:

steadman

Then there’s this.

TIMEPIECE OF THE WEEK: I think I am developing a watch problem. Not cheap, but, this is right up my alley. 

WHEN I WAS YOUR AGE… There are times when I see how kids are regulated today and I wonder if I were better off growing up the way I did. Plus, we had these awesome monstrosities.

PEOPLE ALWAYS ASK ME: Why do you hate people? This week I can point to this guy as the latest reason why. I don’t have patience for the stupid.

AND HERE WE HAVE THE 90’s:

not-so-rock(thank you)

TRUTH IN ADVERTISING: Not for kids, unless they’re smart or weird.

YOU DON’T REALLY WANT TO KNOW THE ANSWER…to this.

LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT? Not only is the stuff NASTY, but it can explode?

“THE HILLS ARE ALIVE…” 

the hills are alive...

THIS RIGHT HERE: All of it. Every last bit of it.

THIS IS WHY WE’RE FAT: None of this sounds appealing to me. Mostly.

WHY INSURANCE COMPANIES SUCK: Exhibit #468

OCTOPHANT!

elephantapus(thank you)

THERE ARE SO MANY THINGS I WANT TO SAY ABOUT…this. But none of them would paint a flattering picture of my sense of humor or maturity level. But totally feel free to go there in the comments.

A GRAVE SITUATION: This is something I wondered about when I was a kid. How much room is there? Everyone approaches this subject personally. For me, I just never felt I was worthy of carving out a permanent space for what’s left of me when I toss my mortal coil.

GAH! Muy espeluzante!

INCOMING!

Need something else to read?

  • Bust a move outside of your comfort zone!
  • Especially numbers 2, 13 and 14. 
  • Cleaning: It doesn’t have to be so…chore-y. See, for instance, Step #1 

Tim Johnstone is Dappered’s music correspondent as well as our resident gatherer of all things interwebs related.

Filed Under: Etc. Tagged With: dossier

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Comments

  1. Eric Henao says

    August 8, 2014 at 7:10 AM

    I’ve already suggested to @Syfy to creating the next monster movie: #Octophant!

  2. Marshall Lilly says

    August 8, 2014 at 7:48 AM

    I want a giant Octophant as a full back piece now…

  3. Ken 2 says

    August 8, 2014 at 7:58 AM

    I love eggnog.

  4. Greg_S says

    August 8, 2014 at 8:16 AM

    So many thoughts from this one today. First, Ryan Phillipe is still famous (and alive)?! Second, I think I am more disturbed that egg nog flavoring is in vat form. Third, that’s a lot of jugs of milk. Get it? Jugs… ya know like… ah never mind.

  5. Shomas says

    August 8, 2014 at 8:27 AM

    Good lord with the homophones. On a related note, I have a running list of homophones that I’ve been keeping for about a decade now. I’m up to well over 300. My favorite is stationary/stationery and the latest one I came across was tighten/titan. So, that tells you basically everything you need to know about how cool I am.

  6. Greg_S says

    August 8, 2014 at 8:28 AM

    You know… it really does…

  7. BenR says

    August 8, 2014 at 8:37 AM

    My mind was blown when I realized stationery (the fancy paper) was spelled with an E. I now read it as “station-erry” in my head.

  8. John P. says

    August 8, 2014 at 8:45 AM

    Why, yes, I am a narcissist.

  9. ardichoke says

    August 8, 2014 at 8:52 AM

    Okay, time to show off my lack of maturity…

    That world record for breast milk donation probably has her swollen with pride.
    Looks like she’s really milking her accomplishment for all it’s worth.
    I wonder if that record has swollen her ego at all?

    Yeah, that’s all I got.

  10. Joe says

    August 8, 2014 at 9:21 AM

    Octophantnado?

  11. Winston Heard says

    August 8, 2014 at 10:07 AM

    spiked, please.

  12. Winston Heard says

    August 8, 2014 at 10:07 AM

    everything’s bigger in texas?

  13. BDevX3 says

    August 8, 2014 at 10:10 AM

    The comments on the article about the burger were hilarious. Somehow people turned an article about unhealthy food options and calorie counts on menus into a message of government over-reach and anti-Michelle Obama propaganda.

    Apparently we’re fat AND stupid.

  14. bryclops says

    August 8, 2014 at 10:56 AM

    That insurance company thing killed me, and the article is now making the rounds at the firm today. Good find, Tim.

  15. bryclops says

    August 8, 2014 at 10:57 AM

    I wish I had been younger than 25 when I had that moment.

  16. Orro says

    August 8, 2014 at 11:29 AM

    The artists are Alexis Diaz and Juan Fernandez from Puerto Rico, but this piece was done in London. Here is their pinterest. Hope you guys enjoy the rest of their work as much as this one! I’m not sure who made the gif.
    http://www.pinterest.com/leoterres/la-pandilla-juan-fernandez-alexis-diaz/

  17. jdw says

    August 8, 2014 at 11:52 AM

    What kind of monster hates eggnog?

  18. BenR says

    August 8, 2014 at 2:20 PM

    The kind of monster that wishes to ascend from his beastly state into full, civilized humanity.

  19. chuckdaly says

    August 13, 2014 at 12:42 PM

    That mannequin is a real corpse, or at least the hands are real. As a recreational artist, I can easily say, no one living or dead, can sculpt hands with that much detail. And if someone could, they would make them look like the hands of someone living.

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