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The Royal Up and Down and the cursive admission.

March 14, 2014 By Tim Johnstone | Heads up: Buying via our links may result in us getting a commission. Also, we take your privacy rights seriously. Head here to learn more.

YOU SNOOZE…

MEANWHILE...meow, emphasis on the ow.

EXTREME REACTION: I had an interesting reaction to this. I went from “whoa – that’s really unfortunate” to “well it’s not that shocking considering the poor guy’s track record” to “wait a minute, did they really print that? (second paragraph).”

EXTREME REACTION PART 2: There are so many scared old white men in this country.  And yes that is hyperbole. And no I don’t want to encourage discussion on the merit of the argument. I just want to poke fun. Is that so wrong? Wait. Nevermind.

CLOWN COUTURE:

soon.clownversion

BEEN THERE, DONE THAT…got the t-shirt. But, really, some of this is kind of funny.

WE’RE GOING TO NEED A BIGGER BOAT: A fascinating tale of a great white mama shark. 

WORST TEST EVER? Having seen the results of Alzheimer’s in person, I think I might find this useful.

LOVE: This right here makes me feel funny.

…YOU LOSE:

THE MATH: It doesn’t add up. And it seems pretty silly too.

HOO BOY…the fact that I kind of totally think this is a great idea instantly calls me out as an old nerd. And that hurts.

SCIENCE IS THE $#!%: This is just kind of awesomely ridiculous.

MMMM-HMMM…

royalupanddown

I SEE DUMB PEOPLE: Sometimes it seems like some people just make their way through life with absolutely no idea how this thing called life really works.

CAN’T HAVE THAT NOW, CAN WE? It would seem that Tesla is scaring the competition.

BANK: This is why marijuana will be more legal than not in the very near future.

INCOMING! This looks fantastic.

Bonus INCOMING. The thing is, I may have run this before but even if I have, it’s worth a second look.

Need something else to read?

  • Spring cleaning has arrived. When was the last time you dealt with your closet?
  • And while you’re in there, you could maybe deal with the proper accessory?
  • If you are fortunate, you’ll have some time off coming your way. Do not waste it. 

Tim Johnstone is Dappered’s music correspondent as well as our resident gatherer of all things interwebs related.

Filed Under: Etc. Tagged With: dossier

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Comments

  1. Andy Porter says

    March 14, 2014 at 6:05 AM

    Man, I got all the way down to the scuba diving story and someone must have opened an old dusty box in my office. My eyes got all misty b/c of that box…..

  2. Corwin says

    March 14, 2014 at 7:16 AM

    His infection got so bad that his hands started doubting western medicine and the beta-blockers that his doctor prescribed…

    Nothing worse than “sceptic” hands.

  3. Corwin says

    March 14, 2014 at 7:30 AM

    Ignoring the pierced and tattooed people afraid of their house cat…

    I really hope that technology survey’s results are weighted more by people’s sense of humor than actual ignorance. While I can certainly make the argument for HTML 4 being an STD, the other responses are completely unacceptable. I’m not sure how anyone can go through life and absorb so little information…

  4. RJC says

    March 14, 2014 at 7:49 AM

    Morning Edition had some hipster backlash yesterday, so this morning they tried to define what makes someone a hipster – beards and fedoras were mentioned, but my favorite was “being about to move to Portland”

  5. Andrew Mitchell says

    March 14, 2014 at 7:54 AM

    The craziest thing to me was the very last question. Over one third of respondents said that knowledge of technology is not important at the present time.

  6. Marshall Lilly says

    March 14, 2014 at 7:58 AM

    That National doc looks great. Another reminder that there’s tons of great music being released these days if you know where to look.

  7. Corwin says

    March 14, 2014 at 8:09 AM

    That’s horrifying. I stopped reading after the list.

    While that certainly explains these people’s responses, the perspective itself begs so many questions. For the sake of my sanity and what little faith in humanity remains, I’m just going to chalk it up to the selection bias of people using that coupon website…. though I wonder how they are able to use the webernet…

  8. Winston Heard says

    March 14, 2014 at 9:03 AM

    ah, jeez… i clicked on that hipster book link, and now amazon is gonna start recommending books about hating hipsters and wars on various groups of people and books with big funny heads on the covers. thanks for that.

  9. RJC says

    March 14, 2014 at 9:14 AM

    The good news is that the survey has been called into question and it might not be real.

    Then again, is it really that far off from what we’d expect?

  10. CosmicQuandaries says

    March 14, 2014 at 11:22 AM

    He’s just mad because we look better and have better taste in music.

  11. Loscv29 says

    March 14, 2014 at 2:44 PM

    What an insufferable person that Gutfeld.

  12. Joe says

    March 14, 2014 at 3:17 PM

    Yes Winston, Amazon sometimes… looks a little too deep:
    https://scontent-b-sea.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/t1.0-9/1653926_10151911221142041_1159808967_n.jpg

    (sidenote: I have no idea who or what that dude is, but I get the feeling you’ve got to consume cable TV news in order to know.)

  13. southy says

    March 14, 2014 at 4:10 PM

    You always see these polls that show you frightening (or frighteningly dumb) results. Yet I never meet these people. Something tells me they either go about the survey in a way to target people who are likely to be ignorant about these issues, or more likely, people do not care about their responses in internet surveys.

  14. Matt says

    March 14, 2014 at 4:17 PM

    Pre-ordered it as soon as I watched the trailer! Trouble Will Find Me may be my favorite record of last year (them and Vampire Weekend are still fighting it out). I don’t think there’s a bad song on there.

  15. Winston Heard says

    March 14, 2014 at 6:46 PM

    this image should be next to “why recommended?”

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