Unlike some things that raise a stir when they up and disappear (Bonobos codes, INC ultra light blazers, etc.) some things in Men’s Style wouldn’t be missed by many if they ceased to exist. There’s no intention to be mean-spirited here. Sometimes you wonder if these things are still around because nobody said: “hey, so… y’know…” Leave any additions in the comments. Top Photo Credit
#1. Faux Collars / Zip in bibs under jackets – Especially those that aren’t removeable. Kill the coat dickey.
#2. Wallace & Barnes at J. Crew – J. Crew is already on the high end of “affordable” retail. This stuff, which is also made by J. Crew, is more expensive and doesn’t look all that different from their main line (although it might be a step up in quality. A reverse J. Crew Factory if you will). Always interesting to see when they include this sub-brand in their “in-good-company” sections of their catalogs. Collaborating with yourself? Can’t you go blind from that?
#3. Emails from retailers extolling the virtues of one item – Steve in Jackson Hole loves this down jacket! That’s swell Steve. Really not good when the product they’re pushing is something you’d have no interest in whatsoever.
Dude. I am a dude.
#4. Pleather elbows on blazers – Many an otherwise great blazer have been ruined by these things. It must cost money to adhere them to the jacket. Here’s to hoping that brands in love with these things cut costs and thus, cut them out of future designs.
#5. Matching tie + Pocket Square sets – As sad as a Pajama-gram on Valentine’s Day.
#6. Ralph Lauren Denim & Supply – Still trying to figure out just what precisely this is all about.
#7. The “You forgot something in your online shopping cart!” email – Nope. Didn’t forget. Just left it. Would be more likely to go back and complete the purchase if the retailer’s follow up email instead read: “We encourage you to reconsider your incomplete purchase, because if you don’t buy that shirt, you’ll die alone. And with a rash.“
#8. Suits with more than 3 buttons – Somebody call Shannon. He needs to lead the intervention for Doug.
That’s at least four. Maybe five. All buttoned too.
#9. Immensely long receipts – Buy one pair of socks and the receipt handed to you looks like the Dead Sea Scrolls.
#10. Functioning sleeve buttons on affordable blazers and suit jackets – The attention to detail is appreciated, but all this does is make tailoring the sleeves close to if not totally impossible. Tough to show some shirt cuff otherwise.
#11. Mannequins with eyes – Or worse yet, mannequins with names. Or those who are yelling.
#12. Shirts with collar stays permanently sewn or glued into the collar – Regular old slots are just fine. Let’s those of us who are hooked on Wurkin Stiffs actually use them.
#13. Style websites that write too many “list” articles – Hey now.
Additions? Disagreements? You think retailers will ever get the hint about functioning sleeve buttons? Leave it below.
Nightmare fuel.