Originally published 5/4/2011
Show your joints. It’s a nice natural breaking point between you and the cloth above. Think of your knees as that 1/4″ of shirt-cuff that intentionally goes past your jacket. Show em’. A max. 9″ or 10″ inseam should work fine for most.
If Ron Jeremy couldn’t somehow manage to go commando in them, leave them on the shelf. You’re not a Nair model, nor are you playing in the ABA. Leave the short shorts to the ladies.
When’s the last time you actually put something in a cargo pocket? If you’re carrying so much that you need cargo pockets, re-prioritize your load. Even if they’re these new “slim” cargos, they’ll just add weight to your shape.
Classic canvas sneakers like Jack Purcells, PF Flyers
If it’s too hot for pants, socks won’t help much either. Use foot powder instead.
If you’re wearing shorts, that means it’s casual. And if it’s casual, that means you can take more risks. It’s summer. Wear some brighter colors. If you are going with a pattern, maybe steer clear from those large plaids all the frat boys favor. Opt for something less noticeable like a pincord or gingham.
It goes without saying, but jorts just don’t make sense. If it’s hot enough for shorts, why throw on a pair made of heavy denim? Do consider the lighter and more airy chambray. Especially in grey.
Even above 85 degrees (unless it’s humid) a pair of light pants can be just as cool because they keep the sun off your legs. There’s a reason why the Sahara dwelling Tuareg people are covered up all the time.
Your heavy leather jeans belt won’t feel right with your shorts. Opt for something like a web or grosgrain belt instead. It doesn’t have to be super bright or striped. Better it’s not if your shorts are stealing the show. Just something lighter.
You know the type. The “Short-Pants are for Children Only” snobs. They’re shorts. Not some goofy hat with a propeller on top
Additions, subtractions, agreements or disagreements all go in the comments section below. And as always, these “commandments” are never carved in stone. Suggestions, and there are always exceptions.
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