The Ten Commandments of Denim Style
Originally Published 1/19/2010
BEHOLD HIS MIGHTY PANTS – We’re offering these suggestions because Moses was in an obvious Robe Rut. Pics are of jeans you SHOULD consider buying*
I. Thou Shalt not buy pre-destroyed Jeans
Would you buy a shirt that’s pre-ripped? No? What makes the lower half of your body any different? Same goes for baseball caps. Wear and tear should be genuine, not fake.
II. Thou Shalt wash only once a week, inside out.
Jeans are meant to be tough. Unless you’ve got a problem with your thighs sweating uncontrollably, you should be fine with a once a week wash. Denim fades with washing, so to keep them dark, wash them once a week. Inside out.
III. Thou Shalt Keep it simple
Easy on the Embellishments, the fading, the whiskers. Leave that crazy stuff to the ladies and the Jersey Shore.
IV. Thou Shalt Keep It Dark
Black is a risk. White is worse. Keep it medium to dark blue. It’s more versatile and you’ll avoid the Dad Jeans look. That and it’s just more visually appealing.
V. Thou Shalt Not Wear Carpenter Jeans
Unless you’re a carpenter. Then you’re fine. Or need to carry a hammer with you for some unknown reason. Lose the loop.
VI. Thou Shalt Not purchase tapered or baggy fits
One of the foundations of having a sense of style is avoiding looking substantially older or younger than you actually are. Those two sorry excuses for “fits” do just that. Keep it to straight or (brace yourselves) boot cut if they don’t flare too much.
VII. Thou Shalt Not purchase skinny Jeans
Are you nineteen years old, Emo, and standing outside of a coffee shop smoking a cigarette? No? Okay. They’re a fad. Steer clear.
VIII. Thou Shalt Not be afraid to wear a tie with Jeans
It can be a really good look. Keep the denim dark, your tie thin, wear a blazer.
IX. Thou Shalt Embrace Low Rise
They feel better, they look better. Make the switch and then try to tell me regular rise doesn’t feel like you’re wearing waders.
X. Thou Shalt not wear Jeans and a Jean Jacket
Some say you can pull it off as long as the washes are drastically different. We say you look like a hoser. Unless you’re Clint Eastwood. Then you look like a bad ass no one would ever want to mess with. Especially over his choice of pants.
*The Jeans Pictured are… starting at the top: Gap Straight Fit Dark Blue Jeans – $54.50, Levi’s 527 Low Rise Boot Cut – $32.99, Banana Republic Dark Wash Jean – $79.50, Calvin Klein Low Rise Straight Leg – $39.99
Can this fet printed up in pamphlet form so I can hand it out to the dudes I see wearing lady jeans? It would be a public service.
Fantastic! Well Said!
I whole heartedly agree with the no tappered or baggy fit jeans. Boys; wear jeans that make your butt look good! Tappered and baggy fit jeans do not cast rear-ends into the best light.
Wish I had seen this one before I wote a version. Love the Moses pic! Looks like we agree on 1, 2, 4, and 7.
<a href=" Feel free to comment on my version
Question. Commandment IV states: Thou Shalt Keep It Dark.
What about jeans that are clearly not a shade of blue, such as these, from Levis. Someone got me a pair of approx that color 514’s a while ago, but I’ve not been able to wear them without having strong reservations about how they look. I’ve yet to wear them except for around the house and maybe the quick errand.
Should jeans of that color be avoided, or are they an exception to the “keep it dark” rule?
Thanks
Interesting… never considered a light/pale gray or taupe option. I think the “keep it dark” only refers to blue. You don’t want to look like you’re wearing those periwinkle Dad-Jeans circa 1991. But a pair of jeans like those from Levi’s look much more fashion forward and stylish. Maybe too much so unless you’re the kinda guy that takes those style risks every once in awhile. I, personally… am not. So I don’t know if I could pull them off. But what I can tell you, is that I have a lot of blue shirts that sometimes make me look like I’m addicted to the color blue when paired with jeans, and that wouldn’t be an issue with the pair you’re talking about.
VI. Thou Shalt Not purchase tapered or baggy fits
still call yourselves a fashion website
I live and die by my Banana Republic boot cut low-rise jeans. You can count on them to keep their washes simple and embellishments to a minimum. My only wish is that they offered a 31 length. I’m at the awkward height were 30 makes me look like I’m in an Amish porn magazine and 32 drags a bit over some of my shoes, causing fraying.
A good tailor can make those 32s from Banana Republic look great on you. I have the same issue with Guess jeans and my tailor works wonders. Just make sure they can do the original hem.
I love most of your stuff but to me boot cut jeans are prolly one of the worst sins you can commit when it comes to denim and you featured a pair in your article as an example of a good pair.
I liked everyones comments and personally agree with everything…except for denimhead; maybe i read it wrong but y would you wear tapered jeans, thats just awkwards and douchebagish…
Yep. Sure did. There are bootcut jeans out there that aren’t obnoxiously flared. My Levi’s 527s are an example. I doubt anyone can tell the difference between those and my Gap authentic fits. Plus, imagine how boring things would be if we all agreed on everything…
You can get 40% off one item today at us.levi.com and if you sign up for their newsletter first you can get free shipping.
@Bryan,
Those jeans look fine. I have a couple pairs of light gray jeans and I love them. I get compliments on them all the time. I think ‘keep it dark’ should only apply to blue jeans.
Thanks for the heads up w00py. I copped some raw selvedge STF 501s for $60 after tax. The fit pictures on Levi’s website sure are unflattering.
@ joe…I feel you but i still think boot cut sucks and if you cant tell the difference than just get a straight leg jean.
Only 3 of them apply to the larger man… I still cannot get jeans tht fit… nearly always the wrong length and ALWAYS overpriced here in Australia…