The Original Ocean’s 11, Cold Weather Fashion from the Past, & Cursing by Region

OLD SCHOOL OCEANS:

(thank you)

LISTEN UP FELLAS: No more hate-lifting and such. Reel in the anger before hitting the gym. On a brighter note, then there’s this. Giggity.

WORLD DOMINATION UPDATE: Alexa, order me some damn pizza rolls. But seriously, wow.

AS GOD IS MY WITNESS…Someone at sometime in the process of setting up this promotion could have stopped this, right? Or has this been lost to the mists of pop culture legend? Editor’s Note: Imagine something similar, only with an animal without wings. Saw that on PBS once. We are a very strange species. Also, it had to do this on the way down, right?

SURPRISINGLY: I don’t really have an issue with this. Huh. That’s kind of old man of me. Sporty slippers.

LIFE PRESERVER: I realize that I am missing out on some really effed-up experiences but this is so very much completely not at all me.

MY KIND OF KID:

YOUR WEEKLY “STRANGER THINGS” UPDATE: So this happened.

IMPLOSION: It is rare when we see something go this horribly wrong on a global scale. I believe the term I’m thinking of at the moment is “haste makes waste.” It also makes for a ginormous hit on the bottom line. But wait! There’s more. And what a blow it must be.

‘MURICA: The people who ordered this action should step back and take a look at how idiotic this is. (Editor’s Note II: Sounds Familiar.) Because, this. Then there’s this.

THROW AWAY YOUR RAZOR: Fuzz and scruff and beards for the win. Sadly, I can not vouch for this as it has not made one iota of difference in my life. #foreveralone

PHYSICS IS FUN: If you’ve ever found yourself under the flight path of a very powerful Air Force fighter plane, you still have no idea what this is like.

MOONDOG:

(thank you)

WONDER WOMEN: The one. The other. Personally, I’m team Milla (Miss Kate is a little dead inside for me). Because, besides her ability to kick zombie ass, there’s this. Also, and especially, this, which still totally rules in an early 90’s kind of way.

CAPITALISM IN ACTION: There’s that free market thing firing on all cylinders. This is such obvious baloney. YES. Baloney.

WHAT ARE WORDS FOR? I live for this stuff. Also, this completely verifies the veracity of Napoleon Dynamite.

SMART COMPANY: Stunning presentation.

LIFE SKILLS: I can barely manage the lawn mower. Meanwhile, this guy will be just fine.

ONCE UPON A TIME: Smithsonian fashion circa 1880.

(thank you)

#want.

ETERNALLY COOL: This is a terrific read about one of the great singer poets of the past 60 years. He remains one of my all time favorite artists. What a life he has led.

WHOOPS: Someone might just be brushing up their resume. That was my first thought. And then I realized they allowed for this very outcome themselves which means that their mark up is even worse than I ever imagined.

CAUTIOUSLY OPTIMISTIC: As long as it is better than its predecessor, I’m game.

LIFEHACK OF THE WEEK: Do you have a Yahoo email account? You should probably head over here.

THE CIRCLE OF LIFE. Or something. But it’s an interesting something.

TRICK OR TREAT:

(gracias)

SPEAKING OF NIGHTMARE FUEL: Go ahead. Play around with this site for a spell and make yourself sick six different ways ’til Sunday.

BLIMEY! No wonder I’m such an Anglophile. I fit right in.

SCIENCE! This is not the first I’m reading of this particular therapy. This is obviously important work. I wonder if this is what you start out to do or do you just end up there? So many questions.

BEFORE HARAMBE: There is virtually nothing good about what happens in this story. The fact that I’m still thinking about it two days after reading it says something about it. Still not sure? It’s called “Massacre at Monkey Hill.”

UPDATE: Forget the steak, your dog now wants weed. This is the part where I admit that I have a friend who believes his pup has benefitted greatly from it.

INCOMING!

Tim Johnstone is Dappered’s music correspondent as well as our resident gatherer of all things interwebs related. He doesn’t really hate people. Mostly.